Skip to main content

I dont have a 5 trillion dollar deficit. I love everybody. I never was a draft dodger. I was John McCain's co-pilot. I wasn't in the Paris Hilton, it was the Hanoi Hilton.  Please read on below my thought cloud or malleable truthiness.

My real name is Wilfredo Romneyguez and I was born in the middle of the Rio Grande (some of my closest friends call me Tuco - esp after the debate!), so yes, I am Mexicano and Americano! I am not a billionaire, I am broke! I gave away all my money to homelessness.  And women?  I love women, I am, actually a woman in a man's body!  But, of course, I still know how to swing the weight.
 Vote for me...I am what you want me to be, just tell me what you want me to be....I will change my name, I will change my complexion. Anything! I can fly, I can walk through walls.

Little puppies follow me for miles. People who stutter speak fluently ever after having shook my hand. I am magic. I mean everything to everyone. Vote for me...please...this isn't a sneer...it's a divine condescension to you mortal dregs. Vote for me...this is hard. This is my destiny.  Please, don't mess it up!  I am supposed to be president.
  Listen, if you can't borrow money from mom & dad - I will wash your car, walk your dog, I'll even send out help to do the windows.
  And as far as all the bad guys in the world go..well, they better watch out, I know who they are and I won't fool around with any of that antsy pantsy diplomacy!  In fact, my plan is to invade, right away.  Don't ask me where because, well, if I tell you my enemies could use it against me.  I want it to be a surprise.  Heck, it might even be a surprise to me.  Yes, yes, in case you are wondering I have my own darts and my own maps.
  Again, I want to stress.  I love you.  Really I do, whoever you are, especially if you are someone I might soon send capriciously to go fight die or be maimed in a far away land or if you want a job but the whole concept of minimum wage is erased by my Divine Etch-a=Sketch policies and you don't have enough food to put on your family.  I like you.  Gosh.  I love you.  A vote for me is a vote for love!

Poll

Will Mitt Claim Obama is really from Mars

0%0 votes
0%0 votes
33%1 votes
66%2 votes

| 3 votes | Vote | Results

EMAIL TO A FRIEND X
Your Email has been sent.
You must add at least one tag to this diary before publishing it.

Add keywords that describe this diary. Separate multiple keywords with commas.
Tagging tips - Search For Tags - Browse For Tags

?

More Tagging tips:

A tag is a way to search for this diary. If someone is searching for "Barack Obama," is this a diary they'd be trying to find?

Use a person's full name, without any title. Senator Obama may become President Obama, and Michelle Obama might run for office.

If your diary covers an election or elected official, use election tags, which are generally the state abbreviation followed by the office. CA-01 is the first district House seat. CA-Sen covers both senate races. NY-GOV covers the New York governor's race.

Tags do not compound: that is, "education reform" is a completely different tag from "education". A tag like "reform" alone is probably not meaningful.

Consider if one or more of these tags fits your diary: Civil Rights, Community, Congress, Culture, Economy, Education, Elections, Energy, Environment, Health Care, International, Labor, Law, Media, Meta, National Security, Science, Transportation, or White House. If your diary is specific to a state, consider adding the state (California, Texas, etc). Keep in mind, though, that there are many wonderful and important diaries that don't fit in any of these tags. Don't worry if yours doesn't.

You can add a private note to this diary when hotlisting it:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from your hotlist?
Are you sure you want to remove your recommendation? You can only recommend a diary once, so you will not be able to re-recommend it afterwards.
Rescue this diary, and add a note:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from Rescue?
Choose where to republish this diary. The diary will be added to the queue for that group. Publish it from the queue to make it appear.

You must be a member of a group to use this feature.

Add a quick update to your diary without changing the diary itself:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary?
(The diary will be removed from the site and returned to your drafts for further editing.)
(The diary will be removed.)
Are you sure you want to save these changes to the published diary?

Comment Preferences

Subscribe or Donate to support Daily Kos.

Click here for the mobile view of the site