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It's nice to know that there's something watching over us at all times, controlling our destiny. WE LOVE YOU TOO, UNMANNED MILITARY DRONES!

A headline said "Radical Cleric Extradited to U.S." As if we need another televangelist.

People constantly say "I want a President I can drink a beer with.". Obama has a damn home brewery and they still talk shit.

So basically now everyone wants representation without taxation.

In the 1980's it took me over a minute to get a bra off. Today, it takes me less than a minute to get her off. So, yeah, progress.

Wonder Woman: - Comes from a society of Amazons that think all men are misogynists. - Fights crime in bikini armor and high heels.

Walmart claims a few of its products are fair trade. That's like a serial killer bragging about letting a couple guys go.

Hoping future generations think of me as The Man Who Never Died.

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