Sunday Puzzle is a weekly party, featuring puzzles suitable for group puzzle-solving. Everyone is welcome, and you don't need to be a puzzle genius to take part.
On tap tonight:
* a new 27-clue JulieCrostic;
* a new Crypto-Gremlin;
* a new mystery puzzle; and
* a re-post of last week's unsolved logic puzzle.
All that, plus the weekly "Where's Vagina?" challenge. Each week the word vagina appears somewhere in one of the clues or one of the answers to the week's puzzles. Where is the virtuous vagina hiding this week?
So come on down, introduce yourself if you'd like, take a look at the puzzles, and have some Sunday night fun.
Let's start with tonight's mystery puzzle.
Very last abbreviated ancient city home often precedes this news agency = a spymaster for Romney's type of enterprise. (7, 10)
I won't tell you what kind of puzzle this is (but OldPhart and UnionMade will probably be able to guess what kind it is right away)...
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While you ponder that, here's tonight's JulieCrostic to play with. (Those of you unfamiliar with what JulieCrostics are and how they work can find complete instructions, along with an example of a solved puzzle, in Sunday Puzzle Warm-Up.)
A quick word about tonight's puzzle before you start. Two weeks ago the acrostic verticals were "a department of peace". I'd intended this to be the first of several acrostics with a common theme -- and I may return to that theme next week.
But tonight's acrostic is not part of that series. It's a quick fill-in puzzle I constructed last week just in case one were needed for the potluck.
So you won't get much help from past puzzles in figuring out what tonight's verticals mean. But since the vertical is somewhat obscure (it's something I only recently learned of myself) I've included some help for you in one of the other puzzles posted tonight. (Which one? Well, I'll leave that for you folks to figure out.)
As usual I've grouped the clues in tidy bundles of 3 -- but that doesn't necessarily mean there are 3 answers to a row. I just like grouping the clues that way.
1. hot
2. what a con needs in order to make money
3. big-headed
4. tight race location
5. nothing
6. kind of cloth
7. sunday puzzlers
8. undesirable ooze
9. large size
10. cooling device
11. word of warning
12. unamerican group
13. helens' immediate predecessor
14. rested
15. prayer place
16. addendum
17. travelers' aid
18. hooks
19. what comes after j
20. lamp or motor
21. hodgepodge
22. soldier
23. tamper with
24. arena
25. sharp tool
26. remiss
27. film foley
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Time now for a new Crypto-Gremlin. These are cryptograms with a twist which makes them unsolveable by online cryptogram solving programs. The twist is that I make sure every word begins with a consonant (or consonant sound) and ends with a vowel (or vowel sound) before encrypting the text. You can find a complete explanation here.
Yikes ikllsong yisos pk eicham hkes bgnusecbns bgulkor ukbbcasoekzzr bhskesnc pk lishgugos eikes ehkondghung eis dsukzs lglmzkecgoc fcoeg ukom wskecotr ugoneshng? Xsoeshk eis yghzam tgdc Dkzlik Tchzg, wkoam dgzzgy Xmaceis Usrshng fgok ishk vmsnem eg nmhfcfs wkoam hsnbms ishk zceezs jhgeishc dhgus eis fktcoklgbkzrlns.
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Lastly, here's the logic puzzle which went unsolved last week. (For those who find this a little too long to wade through, I'll post a condensed version in the tip jar)
Hal Humbug's Horrible Headache
Oh, my aching head! exclaimed the right-wing radio talk show host on awakening. I must have taken one too many oxycontins.
He looked around. The room didn't look familiar. And, looking out the window, the world didn't look familiar. Well, no time to think about that now. Almost broadcast time! He rushed to the studio to record the day's show.
He was surprised when he got to the studio to discover that he broadcast under the pseudonym Sir Hal Humbug. I must be a bit addled, he thought.
Quickly he skimmed his briefing sheet. Today he had 4 of the Elephant Party's presidential candidates (all of whom were seeking his endorsement) scheduled to be on the phone to answer questions. Elephant Party, he thought? Oh, well, close enough.
The candidates' names looked a little unfamiliar, as well -- but close enough to what he remembered. There was front-runner Tiny Tommer (a former Massachusetts governor whom nobody liked and nobody trusted), not-a-chancer Bishel Mockman (a Minnesota member of congress and leader of the Bathist Insane Caucus), not-a-chancer Sick Rantorum (a former senator better known online than off), and Prick Erry (Texas governor and Tommer's only serious competition at the moment).
Feeling unsure of what he had planned to ask the candidates, Humbug reviewed the notes he'd made.
There were 4 factions in the Elephant Party. Least to Humbug's liking were the 'Phant-asides: members of the party who favored a big tent and were willing to put ideological differences aside. 'Phant-asides strictly alternated telling lies and telling the truth, and their first statement to you might be either.
Next were the Psycho-'phants: hard-line social conservatives. Their first statement to you was always a lie, after which they alternated telling the truth and telling lies. But their short-term memory wasn't good; if more than a couple of minutes elapsed between questions they often forgot what their last answer had been. When this happened, they always started afresh with a lie and then proceeded to alternate again.
Then there were the 'Phant-assists: folks who were members of the Elephant Party but no one was really clear why. Useful idiots, Humbug thought; he was delighted to have these folks as listeners, but not sure he'd ever want one as president. 'Phant-assists always started their statements to you with a lie, then alternated truth and lies. Like 'Phant-asides, their short-term memory was unreliable and if more than a couple of minutes elapsed they forgot whether their last answer had been true or false. When this happened, they'd randomly re-start with either the truth or a lie.
And finally there were the new kids on the block: the Pee Tartiers. These were Humbug's kind of people: dependable in their hatred of the current president, and dependable in their answers. Pee Tartiers always lied.
The presidential candidates had been somewhat coy to date about revealing which party faction they belonged to, in order to try to appeal for votes to as many factions as possible. So no one except the candidates themselves was sure which one belonged to which faction -- but it was known that each of these candidates was a member of a different one of the 4 factions.
Humbug felt that the best candidate would be the one who lied the most consistently. He hoped to use today's show to determine which candidate was the Pee Tartier and give his endorsement to that candidate.
He had 5 questions prepared:
1. What is the most important issue facing the nation?
2. What will your first action in office be?
3. Why should I endorse you?
4. If you had to pick one of the other candidates as your vice president, which one would you choose?
5. How honest do you think your fellow candidates are?
...
First on the line was Bishel Mockman. Humbug engaged her in conversation and, during the conversation, asked his questions. Her responses were:
1. The president plans to turn us into a nation of gay Muslim Marxists.
2. I'll put all the gays in therapy which will convert them to straights, put all the Muslims into therapy which will convert them to Christians, and put all the Marxists into therapy which will convert them to corpses.
3. As a 'Phant-aside, my highest priority is a concern for the children, a concern I'm sure you share.
4. I'd pick Sick Rantorum as my veep, since he's a 'Phant-asider like me and shares my passion for kids.
5. I have the highest regard for all the other candidates; like me, they have high moral standards and would never knowingly tell a lie.
After thanking Mockman and taking a break, Humbug talked with Tiny Tommer. Tommer's answers were:
1. Abortion is an issue I've always felt strongly about and is the most urgent issue facing the nation right now, especially if it's the issue most of the people whose votes I need in order to win the primaries care about most deeply.
2. I'm in favor of outlawing all abortions, with no exception; except, of course, as I've always said, this is something which should be left entirely to the states as soon as we pass a human life amendment to the constitution.
3. Like you and many of your listeners, I'm a devout Pee Tartier.
4. I'd probably pick Sick Rantorum to be my veep, since like me he's a Pee Tartier.
5. Bishel Mockman was honest in all her answers to you -- except possibly that last one ;)
After another commercial break it was Prick Erry's turn:
1. The most pressing need of our time is for more tax cuts and more cuts to government spending, especially on social programs, so that we can grow the economy and so that we can motivate people to take responsibility.
2. Look, I know you're going to ask about the other candidates' honesty I'm going to ignore your question and jump aheas to that: all the answers Tiny Tommer gave you were lies.
3. You should support me over the others because I'm the only Pee Tartier who's running.
4. Ooh! Getting back to the question of the other candidates' honesty: every answer Bishel Mockman gave to you was a lie, too.
5. Now, as to that who would I pick for VP question -- I guess I'd pick Sick Rantorum.
Finally Humbug got Sick Rantorum on the line:
1. The gays have a plan to force all heterosexuals (even women!) to engage in man-on-dog sex, and dealing with this will be my top priority.
2. My first day in office I'd have a Pee Tartier like Tiny Tommer lead the nation in prayer.
3. I'm not personally a member of the Pee Tartiers, but have great respect for those like you and Tiny Tommer who are.
4. I'd probably pick Bishel Mockman as my veep just because she's so hot!
5. Tiny Tommer mostly told the truth; if he made any counter-factual statements it was no more than one.
Hal Humbug considered the answers. They made his head hurt. (Or maybe that was still the effects of the oxycontin...) So he, like you, was left pondering the question:
Which of the candidates Humbug interviewed is the Pee Tartier?
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Have fun and I'll see you in comments!