Skip to main content

Follow @DailyKosComics !

In the past, they targeted states.  Then districts.  Then came Reagan Democrats, followed by Soccer Moms, then, the Grizzly Mama.

Now, just in time for Election twenty-twelve comes:  "Micro-targeting Undecideds!"

Billy Pinkerton's left lobe finds the cool logic of Obama appealing, but his right lobe finds the creative accounting and mystery of Mitt Romney exciting!

But this election will not be decided by Billy's left or right lobes-- this election will be decided by . . . his scalp dander!

Those notoriously fickle undecided flakes!

[Polling has progressed to such a powerful micro-level, undecided flakes have become crucial to deciding the future of our Republic!]

The latest poll of Billy's scalp dander finds fifty-point-one percent of undecided flakes found Obama too aggressive in the debate, while forty-nine-point-nine percent found him passive and unfocused.

Thanks to the growing political power of undecided flakes, new debate formats are in the works.

The Road Trip Debate:  where just one undecided flake conducts a thirty-six-hour tiny town hall in a small sedan!

[You're not gonna' let me fall asleep, are you?  Tell me a story or something…]

The Kitchen Table Debate.

[Which ever one a you fellas cooks me the best omelette's got my vote!]

And the Seventy-two-hour Decisionator Debate.

[I-I-I know it's important, but, but-- I just can't dec-- can I have more time?]

Micro-targeting Undecideds!

Because our future rests with . . . Billy's undecided flakes.

(With a four percent margin-of-error for undecided flakes who could not decide if they were undecided.)

Originally posted to Daily Kos on Fri Oct 19, 2012 at 07:00 AM PDT.

Also republished by Comics.

Your Email has been sent.
You must add at least one tag to this diary before publishing it.

Add keywords that describe this diary. Separate multiple keywords with commas.
Tagging tips - Search For Tags - Browse For Tags


More Tagging tips:

A tag is a way to search for this diary. If someone is searching for "Barack Obama," is this a diary they'd be trying to find?

Use a person's full name, without any title. Senator Obama may become President Obama, and Michelle Obama might run for office.

If your diary covers an election or elected official, use election tags, which are generally the state abbreviation followed by the office. CA-01 is the first district House seat. CA-Sen covers both senate races. NY-GOV covers the New York governor's race.

Tags do not compound: that is, "education reform" is a completely different tag from "education". A tag like "reform" alone is probably not meaningful.

Consider if one or more of these tags fits your diary: Civil Rights, Community, Congress, Culture, Economy, Education, Elections, Energy, Environment, Health Care, International, Labor, Law, Media, Meta, National Security, Science, Transportation, or White House. If your diary is specific to a state, consider adding the state (California, Texas, etc). Keep in mind, though, that there are many wonderful and important diaries that don't fit in any of these tags. Don't worry if yours doesn't.

You can add a private note to this diary when hotlisting it:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from your hotlist?
Are you sure you want to remove your recommendation? You can only recommend a diary once, so you will not be able to re-recommend it afterwards.
Rescue this diary, and add a note:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from Rescue?
Choose where to republish this diary. The diary will be added to the queue for that group. Publish it from the queue to make it appear.

You must be a member of a group to use this feature.

Add a quick update to your diary without changing the diary itself:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary?
(The diary will be removed from the site and returned to your drafts for further editing.)
(The diary will be removed.)
Are you sure you want to save these changes to the published diary?

Comment Preferences

Subscribe or Donate to support Daily Kos.

Click here for the mobile view of the site