Skip to main content

A MESSAGE from MITT ROMNEY to UNMARRIED FEMALE UNITS

  As you know, exit polling indicated that I lost the female unit vote by 12% and the unmarried, female unit vote by 38%.  Therefore, I have determined that my female unit outreach was inadequate.  I thank the female unit, known as Ann, for conducting my female unit outreach.  However, evidently her assurance to female units that since I chose her as my celestial help-mate and since I supported, cherished, loved and respected her, I would be the best elective choice for all female units did not work.  
   Consequently, in keeping with my Mexican heritage and my Mormon faith, I have decided to increase my outreach to unmarried female units for CAMPAIGN ROMNEY2016.  I hereby offer to celestially marry all unmarried, female units who are registered voters.  I will pledge to support, honor, cherish and respect all female units who choose to be sealed to me.   In return, all I will expect is your vote in 2016.  (In keeping with current Mormon doctrine, I would expect no carnal commitment in this terrestrial plain.  Only the female unit known as Ann need be concerned with this.)  
   Please express your interest by replying to MarryMeMitt@Romney2016.com.  
   (Please note:  No male, homosexuals need reply).
   Sincerely, Mitt Romney – ROMNEY2016

EMAIL TO A FRIEND X
Your Email has been sent.
You must add at least one tag to this diary before publishing it.

Add keywords that describe this diary. Separate multiple keywords with commas.
Tagging tips - Search For Tags - Browse For Tags

?

More Tagging tips:

A tag is a way to search for this diary. If someone is searching for "Barack Obama," is this a diary they'd be trying to find?

Use a person's full name, without any title. Senator Obama may become President Obama, and Michelle Obama might run for office.

If your diary covers an election or elected official, use election tags, which are generally the state abbreviation followed by the office. CA-01 is the first district House seat. CA-Sen covers both senate races. NY-GOV covers the New York governor's race.

Tags do not compound: that is, "education reform" is a completely different tag from "education". A tag like "reform" alone is probably not meaningful.

Consider if one or more of these tags fits your diary: Civil Rights, Community, Congress, Culture, Economy, Education, Elections, Energy, Environment, Health Care, International, Labor, Law, Media, Meta, National Security, Science, Transportation, or White House. If your diary is specific to a state, consider adding the state (California, Texas, etc). Keep in mind, though, that there are many wonderful and important diaries that don't fit in any of these tags. Don't worry if yours doesn't.

You can add a private note to this diary when hotlisting it:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from your hotlist?
Are you sure you want to remove your recommendation? You can only recommend a diary once, so you will not be able to re-recommend it afterwards.
Rescue this diary, and add a note:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from Rescue?
Choose where to republish this diary. The diary will be added to the queue for that group. Publish it from the queue to make it appear.

You must be a member of a group to use this feature.

Add a quick update to your diary without changing the diary itself:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary?
(The diary will be removed from the site and returned to your drafts for further editing.)
(The diary will be removed.)
Are you sure you want to save these changes to the published diary?

Comment Preferences

Subscribe or Donate to support Daily Kos.

Click here for the mobile view of the site