Skip to main content

Not that these jobs really exist (at least, I don't think they do), but these are all jobs I could do, and do well. I doubt anyone would pay for any of these, which is why I do them all for free.

More or less in order of preference:

Fragrance Butler  I can create the proper fragrance for every room of the home for different times of the day or night or events happening, as well as car, office, closets, and personal wearing, male or female.  The fragrances would be tailored for the person, the time, the occasion, the location. It can take up to a year to design the right suite of fragrances, and they would need to be updated when life style changes happened.  The fragrances would be all natural, with no artificial ingredients, and could be in the form of simmering fragrances, solid perfumes, spritzes, splashes, strewing, baths, powders, oils, candles, washes, lotions, potions, incenses, pads, diffusers, moist potpourris, dry potpourris, pomanders, ornaments, beads, misters, and timed poppers.

Tea Sommelier I can select and blend teas for every occasion, meal, and purpose, in many forms:  hot, cold, lozenges, bubbles, chewies, salts, brittles, jellies, salads, honeys, coffees, and milks, and with or without formalities.

Odd Topic Lecturer I can speak on a variety of obscure and odd topics, from survivalism to steampunk, from dogs to science fiction, from guerrilla gardening to ghostbusting.

Herbal Soother I can make a variety of herbal products that provide comfort, from lotions and potions to balls, lozenges, eye washes, baths, and other comfort items.  These are not medicinal and won't cure anything, but they can make you feel better, more comfortable. All herbal, all natural.

Meticulous Manners Maven I can give entertaining, interactive classes n manners, why they matter, how to use them to improve one's life:  fun manners, social manners, work manners, play manners, the history of manners, games involving manners, and the accessories that can accompany meticulously excellent manners.

Specialty Garden Starter Consultant I can help design and direct the building of any number of fantasy and specialty gardens, from an all black Goth garden to a poison garden to a night blooming garden, to a "clock" garden, to a potager, and beyond. I can also design interior gardens, wall gardens, and hanging gardens of various sorts. I can also design fairy gardens, both interior and exterior,for human delights or for fairy use.

Home Whimsicalizer I can add touches of whimsey to any home, finding odd nooks and crannies to locate fairy doors, space portals, otherwhen keyholes, and more.

Psychic Storyteller Using elements from your life, I can tell stories that you need to hear, as well as ones that will entertain you. Individual stories as well as group or family tales, and even ongoing sagas, with the occasional poem.

Fairy Architect I can design and build a wide variety of fairy dwellings, including furnishings for fairies of all ages and family sizes.

Personal Pet Chef I can create healthy meals for practically any pet, from rodent like mice, rats, and rabbits to cats, dogs, ferrets, lizards, and birds.

Soap Concierge I can select soaps for any purpose, soap includes shampoos,dish and laundry soaps, liquid soaps, solid soaps, gel soaps, powdered soaps.  If necessary, I can even make the soaps, both in traditional methods and avant garde methods. They can soothe emotions or unhappy skin as well as clean, fragrant or free of fragrances.

Personal Children's Chef I can make special kid friendly meals for children of all ages, from baby's first foods to fussy toddler meals to meals teens love, either weekly or monthly. Breakfasts, snacks, lunches, dinners, school-ready lunches, all the parent, care-giver, or child has to do is take it from the freezer to thaw or heat. They can be whimsical (similar to bento) or color coordinated for the fussy eater.

What fantasy jobs could you do?

EDITED TO ADD: I forgot this one!  How could I forget this one!!???!!

Gargoyle's Playhouse Owner/Manager A combination LARP, board games, tabletop games, computer games, theater, dance hall, and mocktail soda bar emporium, set up like a maze so people enter and wander from game room to play room to theater, and quench their thirst at the old fashioned soda bar with freshly made potato chips, popcorn, and other finger foods both hot and cold. Includes a bouncy room and a room layered with balls to swim and play in.

Your Email has been sent.
You must add at least one tag to this diary before publishing it.

Add keywords that describe this diary. Separate multiple keywords with commas.
Tagging tips - Search For Tags - Browse For Tags


More Tagging tips:

A tag is a way to search for this diary. If someone is searching for "Barack Obama," is this a diary they'd be trying to find?

Use a person's full name, without any title. Senator Obama may become President Obama, and Michelle Obama might run for office.

If your diary covers an election or elected official, use election tags, which are generally the state abbreviation followed by the office. CA-01 is the first district House seat. CA-Sen covers both senate races. NY-GOV covers the New York governor's race.

Tags do not compound: that is, "education reform" is a completely different tag from "education". A tag like "reform" alone is probably not meaningful.

Consider if one or more of these tags fits your diary: Civil Rights, Community, Congress, Culture, Economy, Education, Elections, Energy, Environment, Health Care, International, Labor, Law, Media, Meta, National Security, Science, Transportation, or White House. If your diary is specific to a state, consider adding the state (California, Texas, etc). Keep in mind, though, that there are many wonderful and important diaries that don't fit in any of these tags. Don't worry if yours doesn't.

You can add a private note to this diary when hotlisting it:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from your hotlist?
Are you sure you want to remove your recommendation? You can only recommend a diary once, so you will not be able to re-recommend it afterwards.
Rescue this diary, and add a note:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from Rescue?
Choose where to republish this diary. The diary will be added to the queue for that group. Publish it from the queue to make it appear.

You must be a member of a group to use this feature.

Add a quick update to your diary without changing the diary itself:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary?
(The diary will be removed from the site and returned to your drafts for further editing.)
(The diary will be removed.)
Are you sure you want to save these changes to the published diary?

Comment Preferences

Subscribe or Donate to support Daily Kos.

Click here for the mobile view of the site