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If possible, things inside the Vatican have actually gotten worse.

The top cardinal from the UK quit. The allegations against this gay-bashing cretin consist of . . .  his own gay activities with priests.

Mahoney received several petitions before his trip to Rome. Over 15,000 signatures were received, begging, demanding, and insisting that he withdraw and not fly to Rome, because of his own dirty paw-prints on the recent docu-dump from LA. For years, he plotted to hide and protect pedophile priests, and to hell with the sheeple, especially thousands of little boys and girls. Mahoney rejected all rational requests. But he did demand that those folks raped by priests over several decades,  pray and apologize for causing him such discomfort.  

Ireland is still seething about the thousands of cases of abuse, torture, and beatings by church officials, especially in the cases of orphans and unwed moms. There are rumors that the church may seek some sort of bankruptcy protection.

Milwaukee's archdiocese was smacked upside its collective head after a judge denied their effort to hide over $23 millions in assets, by shifting the general funds (therefore, available to plaintiffs in child abuse cases) to a fund for the upkeep of a tiny cemetery in the city. Other litigation games were also rejected.

Vatican Bank's problems continue to grow. Chase Bank is cooperating with euro police in hunting down millions of funds that appear to be related to drug dealing profits and gun running. The Vatican's Sec. of State, probably one of the more corrupt people within the City walls, continues to amass power in advance of the upcoming vote.

Careful reading of the Vatican's angry response to Italy's biggest daily newspaper, Repubblica,  fails to disclose any one point where they claim the newspaper lied. A few days earlier, an explosive article linked the  Rat's resignation  to the disclosure of a network of gay priests and bishops within the Vatican. Blackmail, it seems, is a way of life within the hallowed halls.

The Pope even went so far as to change the rules. If all the cardinals arrive early, he wants the conclave to start early - something never done in the history of the church.

From the church of ineffable stupidity:

The Conclave will start by the middle of next week. After that, watch for hundreds of pointless, wrong, and contradictory rumors to spread. In terms of power politics, graft, greed, blackmail, bribery, crimes financial and physical, I doubt that there is any spectacle on earth that comes close to what we are about to witness. There is little doubt that the current Pope simply threw up his hands at the internal corruption and politics, things which were all stacked against him.

But do not feel sorry for the little rat. He gets to keep the title "Holiness", he gets to wear all white, including handmade Prada leather shoes, and he gets to stay inside, away from any extradition or criminal complaints that might have caused him to fear the outside world.

The following is guaranteed:
1. The eventual choice will disappoint many.
2. Regardless of the new pope's own bag of sins and crimes, people will still flock irrationally to some crossed building,  fall on their knees, prey for his success, and donate money to the church. As if it didn't steal enough already.
3. Nothing will change in the Vatican Bank
4. The recent wave of anti-Vatican II conservatism, since the death (Murder?) of JP1, only 33 days into his reformist campaign, will continue unabated. This will lead to the Bill Donahoes of the world dancing with joy, as they piss on the rights of women, children and gays around the world.
5. More intrigue and rumors will follow the newly selected pope.

Given just how incredible this story is, someone, someday, sometime, will leak the 300 page study that drove The Rat to resign. Perhaps La Repubblica did get the actual text, or at least, some of it. Still, blood and death in the future is clearly not out of the question, not when power politics is played with such well honed knives and deviousness. After all, they've been at it for 17 centuries. Our politics and politicians are mere silly children in comparison. Especially the TeaBaggers.

Originally posted to Church of Ineffable Stupidity on Tue Feb 26, 2013 at 07:28 AM PST.

Also republished by Street Prophets .


What sort of popcorn do you prefer over the conclave?

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| 39 votes | Vote | Results

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