Usually I do not check the spam pages of my Yahoo account but glory to all the Gods that I did that today! Two responses about guys asking about my newly published ebook (had a broken link in my email) had gone to my spam box so that was nice but the biggest surprises were yet to come.
1. I had ignored a previous letter from FBI Director Robert Mueller so Janet Napolitano, US Homeland Secretary had taken the kind courtesy to warn me that if I did not pay $220 within 3 days, I would lose the $40 Million which is waiting for me in the Bank of Benin, Africa. Knowing something about compound interest, I am kicking myself for not taking the FBI seriously and once I complete this post, am on my way to Western Union to wire Janet the money. Am so excited to share this news with Daily KOS family!
2. The fun just doesn't seem to stop. I am now two time lucky. The Malaysian Lottery Agency has picked me for the second prize from all the billions of email addresses and I have just won $750,000. Thank you Yahoo! Somebody said that only winning matters. Right now, I am more than happy with the second prize. Only this seems to be pocket change compared to what the Benin Bank is offering me.
3. Well once the money is in, can girls and fast cars be far behind? The most gorgeous and hottest girls on the planet now want to date me. I wonder why? Maybe they came to know of the lottery jackpot? News travels fast I suppose. Of course at my age, I may need a certain blue pill and guess what, these are just for the asking from all the online and net pharmacies who only seem to stock my kinda pills.
4. Ah, for the joys of spam! Loans are being sanctioned left and right and credit limits are removed for me. No application required! I have parcels and couriers from people and companies I never ordered from. Banks are asking me to reenter my account details; perhaps they want me to deposit my lottery earnings with them and Facebook and other giant companies are desperately wanting to contact me to update my personal info. Could they want me to invest in them or drive up their stock?
Now that I am filthy rich, I can afford to do the things I always desired and wanted to do. Take that long vacation, create a big endowment for my school, pay off my house and just golf all day. Can anybody recommend a good financial planner? Thanks in advance.
I always have a fall back option even in my dreams. Here are links to my ebook which will anyways sell in the thousands nay millions and I don't need the lottery to set me on my path to competing for richest blogger on Daily Kos.
A very spamtastic weekend to all of you!