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So we got this little itty bitty 776 sq ft house we bought in 2001. Worked for PeopleSoft, made good money, needed a tax writeoff and got stock options. Bought the thing for 114K, gut rehab'd it and had the awesome good luck to get the first renter in there for almost eight years. Paid the rent early. If he had a problem, he would tell us and we would fix it. We sent him 50 buck Home Depot gift cards every Christmas. Then we decided to put a new roof and central heat/air on the house in 2010. Finished 9/2010. He called a few weeks later. This sucks = I put in an offer on a bank reo months ago, they just called me up and said they will take the offer. Hell, can't blame him. The sonofabitch sold for 360+ and he got the house for under 100.

So we put the house on the rental market again. Landed a gal there for a year and a half Put in a new kitchen cabinet and painted the exterior. She decided that she needed to bail because finances Fine. The last renter was a guy who was breaking with his girlfriend. 6 months goes by he calls up and says the house got broke into and somebody stole all his gunz! Really?! The address he gave to send his deposit refund was the same address he gave when he moved in. Dude - just say you got back together with your girlfriend and cut the fucking shit - ok?

CitiBank approached last summer and offered us a refi from our 5.875 note to 4.50 under the hamp program. I really did not understand this as we were an investor loan from the start. We bought the property as an investor. Of course, we would take the refi - who wouldn't? We got fucked from start to finish. The payoff amount on the loan was 1400 more than the amount on my monthly statement. When I brought that up to my f'n crackass loan officer in FL, he said that the number would change! LOL!! He also emailed me and said that the moneeys for escrow would transfer. They didn't. The fucker told me to go ahead and make the payment for the next month. If we closed when specified, they would refund the money. Guess what?? No refund.

CitiBank are fucking criminals. I have already told the idiot broker handling our sale - that you better get a number out of them for the payoff and don't be surprised when they up the fucking number a couple of days before closing. And that is when I will blow up the fucking deal.

We are out of the fucking stock market. We are about to get out of the fucking real estate market. Both of these are out to fuck us all. Peace. Out.

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Do Wall Street Banksters Fucking Suck?

23%15 votes
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Comment Preferences

  •  Tip Jar (32+ / 0-)

    if a habitat is flooded, the improvement for target fishes increases by an infinite percentage...because a habitat suitability index that is even a tiny fraction of 1 is still infinitely higher than zero, which is the suitability of dry land to fishes.

    by mrsgoo on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 09:05:48 PM PDT

  •  Ain't America great ? (6+ / 0-)

    The standard you walk past is the standard you accept. David Morrison

    by indycam on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 09:11:59 PM PDT

    •  It really is! So I take my purchase offer for the (12+ / 0-)

      property to a friend who just passed the test to be a realtor this afternoon. He choked and said - my broker should look at it. He did. It was fucking horrifying. This box here wasn't checked. That means you as the seller are paying all of this. This addendum wasn't filled out - the spells out who pays for section1 section 2 on the pest report. That means the whole thing is in limbo! And on and on.... I always said that the broker always represented the seller Not anymore They is out for themselves. And you better remember that!  

      We have not sold a property since 2006. We knew that the forms have changed a lot. One thing that really slapped me upside the head, was that as a seller, you should get the Section 1/Section 2 pest report and roof certification BEFORE you list the property! That is a marketing tool.  Our agent did not mention it and we frankly forgot about it. And you want 6% of the sales price for exactly what again??? I am pissed.

      if a habitat is flooded, the improvement for target fishes increases by an infinite percentage...because a habitat suitability index that is even a tiny fraction of 1 is still infinitely higher than zero, which is the suitability of dry land to fishes.

      by mrsgoo on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 09:28:08 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

  •  Makes me glad we paid off our house... (9+ / 0-)

    ...here in Chicago early. Like 17 years on a 30-year mortgage. It's a dump, and we'll be lucky to get anything like a decnt price from a builder who might gut and rehab it, or more likely tear it down and replace it.

    Float like a manhole cover, sting like a sash weight! Clean Coal Is A Clinker!

    by JeffW on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 09:23:56 PM PDT

    •  It's paid off!! That is a huge plus all by itself. (6+ / 0-)

      The value is in the dirt. Hang on as long as you can!

      if a habitat is flooded, the improvement for target fishes increases by an infinite percentage...because a habitat suitability index that is even a tiny fraction of 1 is still infinitely higher than zero, which is the suitability of dry land to fishes.

      by mrsgoo on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 09:31:42 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  Only until we are moved out... (2+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        Calamity Jean, Aunt Pat

        ...and into the new house. I don't want to rent it out, and I don't want to sell it to someone who says they'll move in and work on it in stages. It's old, and the people we bought it from did their rehabs on the cheap.

        The value really is in the dirt: Jefferson Park is a really nice neighborhood, and very convenient transportation-wise. And the builders are building new houses and rehabbing some of the better old ones. You just can't keep a cow around here!

        Float like a manhole cover, sting like a sash weight! Clean Coal Is A Clinker!

        by JeffW on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 09:41:56 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  At the risk of sounding like an asshole R (5+ / 0-)

          Good money to be made in letting them do improvements and you holding the note. Then when they fail, you take the prop. back. I know HOW to be an asshole. It is just something that I do not want to do.

          OTOH - I feel that the DH and I have been totally played by this agent. Now I am totally fucking pissed. I have learned years ago, that your gut feeling is probably right. As things have progressed - that feeling keeps coming back. As I told the DH today after meeting with our buddy and his broker, I feel like we are being squeezed into a situation where we have to take  less then we want for the property. That assumes that the realtor seems to think that we NEED to sell. Told her that from  the start - we are not listing because we need to sell. And I will say this about that, a female screwing over another female - really does not play well with me.

          Next week will be interesting.

          if a habitat is flooded, the improvement for target fishes increases by an infinite percentage...because a habitat suitability index that is even a tiny fraction of 1 is still infinitely higher than zero, which is the suitability of dry land to fishes.

          by mrsgoo on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 10:25:46 PM PDT

          [ Parent ]

          •  No, you're being smart... (1+ / 0-)
            Recommended by:
            mrsgoo

            ...as a responsible owner of an income property. Our house is our primary residence, but that will change once we get our certificate of habitibility, and move into the new house. With 120 miles between Chicago and Orangeville, we aren't too keen to be absentee landlords. And having grown up in my grandparents' apartment building, just being a landlord holds no charms for me.

            Float like a manhole cover, sting like a sash weight! Clean Coal Is A Clinker!

            by JeffW on Sat Aug 10, 2013 at 07:24:41 AM PDT

            [ Parent ]

  •  Here's What I Know. (10+ / 0-)

    Buy before 2007, sell before 2008.

    When you said "2010" and you still owned it, you were already sunk. My heart aches for you because the bill for 40 years of conservative economics came due in 2008, and millions of people holding property that was bought within 10-15 years of then have lost their shirts, and are now like you in total scramble mode.

    We're pretty nervous ourselves because while we've just moved into a decent house we can afford, after great service from our agent on the purchase which doesn't pay him very much, we've got him listing our old house to sell which should give him some serious compensation, but he's gone AWOL.

    So we could be in a heappa trouble in the next few months ourselves.

    We are called to speak for the weak, for the voiceless, for victims of our nation and for those it calls enemy.... --ML King "Beyond Vietnam"

    by Gooserock on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 09:25:32 PM PDT

    •  Home purchase and sales (3+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      JeffW, cassandracarolina, mrsgoo

      It is so damn confusing and you do it so infrequently (hopefully).  It is like a game with the rates...is today lower? how about now!?  Sure you can lock that in...for a fee.

      My home purchase went well but I had 20% down...so I think that helps things.  The refinance went fine as well...and paid off in just under 8 months (dropped a whole percentage point).  I have been lucky...knock on wood.

      When I closed, I made sure that my payment each month was simply for the mortgage.  I pay no additional escrow.  I pay my property taxes and insurance directly myself because I don't trust anyone else to do it.  I have heard too many horror stories about escrow funny business.

      The sequester is the new Republican immigration reform plan. Make things so bad here in the US that no one will want to live here.

      by Mote Dai on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 09:36:15 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  We were required to have an escrow account... (3+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        Aunt Pat, mrsgoo, Calamity Jean

        ...and then the bank sold our mortgage to an idiot mortgage company, who succeeded in draining the escrow account, paying our neighbor's property taxes!

        You see, our old bungalow was originally built to one side of a 50' lot, but was apparently sized for a 30' one. The original owner had the lot resubdivided, and sold the eastern portion, which had a raised ranch built on it in the early 60's. That lot is 24'-8" wide, and ours is 25'-4" wide, but it is described as a 25' lot, plus a 4" strip.

        Calamity Jean eventually got it straightened out, and even managed to get Cook County to refund us the extra taxes, but it also spurred us to refinance to get a more-intelligent mortgage company. It also made it easier to refinance again, and pay off the mortgage early.

        YMMV.

        Float like a manhole cover, sting like a sash weight! Clean Coal Is A Clinker!

        by JeffW on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 09:57:46 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

    •  Darn. (1+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      JeffW

      I must have hit "reply to this" instead of a new comment...i didn't mean to respond to your post.

      The sequester is the new Republican immigration reform plan. Make things so bad here in the US that no one will want to live here.

      by Mote Dai on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 09:38:00 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

  •  No refund? (2+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    JeffW, mrsgoo

    Let me guess, you tried to do this without a RE lawyer?  The closing paralegals know how to shake that tree, but it's tough for an individual.

    I was a RE title searcher for almost 30 years until my eyes went bad last fall.  My first piece of advice to anyone in any RE transaction:  always have a lawyer.  It may seem like an expense, a big one.  But not nearly as large as the costs of not having one.

    Secret powers: Money, loud English, and The Bomb.

    by ActivistGuy on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 09:34:38 PM PDT

    •  CA is an escrow company state. We don't use (3+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      maggiejean, JeffW, mrsgoo

      Real estate attorneys unless a purchase is big and complicated or commercial. There are standard state forms prepared by the agent, which is why having a good agent (and not one handling both sides) is so critical.

      In other words, most homeowner transactions never get reviewed by counsel. I know WA is the same way.

      © grover


      So if you get hit by a bus tonight, would you be satisfied with how you spent today, your last day on earth? Live like tomorrow is never guaranteed, because it's not. -- Me.

      by grover on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 09:42:12 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

  •  about to embark on a similar journey (2+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    mrsgoo, Calamity Jean
    CitiBank are fucking criminals. I have already told the idiot broker handling our sale - that you better get a number out of them for the payoff and don't be surprised when they up the fucking number a couple of days before closing. And that is when I will blow up the fucking deal.

    Warning - some snark may be above‽ (-9.50; -7.03)‽ eState4Column5©2013 "I’m not the strapping young Muslim socialist that I used to be" - Barack Obama 04/27/2013

    by annieli on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 09:43:25 PM PDT

    •  Nail them early and often! That is my plan. (3+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      annieli, JeffW, Calamity Jean

      if a habitat is flooded, the improvement for target fishes increases by an infinite percentage...because a habitat suitability index that is even a tiny fraction of 1 is still infinitely higher than zero, which is the suitability of dry land to fishes.

      by mrsgoo on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 10:34:44 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

  •  I'm sorry you're going thru this msrgoo. (5+ / 0-)

    I hate the whole property buying/selling thing.

    I'd rather buy used cars.

    :(

    © grover


    So if you get hit by a bus tonight, would you be satisfied with how you spent today, your last day on earth? Live like tomorrow is never guaranteed, because it's not. -- Me.

    by grover on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 10:01:35 PM PDT

  •  All you need to know is (6+ / 0-)

    when THEY come to YOU with an offer to "help" you, RUN for the hills.

    Atmospheric levels of carbon dioxide now exceed 400 parts per million for the first time in human history. #stopgaymarriage

    by Flyswatterbanjo on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 10:07:06 PM PDT

    •  Meaning the banks? n/t (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      Flying Goat, Calamity Jean

      Float like a manhole cover, sting like a sash weight! Clean Coal Is A Clinker!

      by JeffW on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 10:11:28 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

    •  No shit! Even when they targeted investor loans! (7+ / 0-)

      No fucking way in hell should they have been targeting investors. I was blown away. But I had read a few diaries out here saying they were targeting folks who were grade A. We actually got a FEDEX soliciting a refinance. In the end - they fucked us. My disdain for citibank knows no end. They are fucking fucks.

      I am out of the stock market. We will sell our rental property eventually. That means that we are not playing your bullshit game anymore.

      Our business and it's property relies on customers. We are building a reliable base of folks that come back because they like what we have. Everytime they come back, we have improved what we have to offer.

      We will continue to do that.

      if a habitat is flooded, the improvement for target fishes increases by an infinite percentage...because a habitat suitability index that is even a tiny fraction of 1 is still infinitely higher than zero, which is the suitability of dry land to fishes.

      by mrsgoo on Fri Aug 09, 2013 at 10:54:55 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

  •  Most of you are experienced investors (1+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    mrsgoo

    (I define experience as having already made all those mistakes before.) You should recognize one inescapable fact; the price of everything is driven by population and world wide population is increasing rapidly.

    Homes and home loans are pricier as inventory finally bottoms out so profits are going up again especially for high end homes and equity properties. With Elizabeth Warren in the Senate Banks will come to heel and more of your return on investment will stay with you. There are new rules checking the activities of shady lenders.

    What happened between 2008 and 2013 was a disaster, but every disaster eventually comes to an end and as the  GOP obstructionists that thought it was a smart move to destroy America and take Obama down with it finish self destructing we have a good chance of seeing control of the house return to sane people in 2014.

    I have a friend who is presently rehabbing a house on the Vinyard to flip it. Purchased for $180 k in a $450 k market he stands to double his money after three months.

    Toll brothers is running out of available properties to buy and starting new construction again. Those of you who have survived the last five years with properties that you managed to maintain can now begin to cash in.

    Live Free or Die --- Investigate, Incarcerate

    by rktect on Sat Aug 10, 2013 at 12:13:29 AM PDT

    •  Banks are getting out of the servicing of loans (1+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      mrsgoo

      because of the capital requirements that have changed. So their "servicing" funds are taking over that component.

      The subprimes and ginned up corporations are coming out of their continual bankruptcies and renaming/rebranding their crooked nine lives and they live again to cheat and rob.


      A society grows great when old men plant trees in whose shade they know they shall never sit.

      by bronte17 on Sat Aug 10, 2013 at 05:10:11 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

  •  I work in Real Estate (6+ / 0-)

    My first bit of advice is NEVER and I mean NEVER sign up for a loan with Citibank, Wells Fargo or BOA.

    Just don't do it.

    Go to local banks, credit unions.  Hell go to TD Bank before even considering the big US banks.  They're Canadian.

    N-E-V-E-R!!!!!!!

    Also if you don't have to sell why sell now?  I'm not sure where you are but chances are the market sucks.  Kill the deal before you get screwed over by an unscrupulous agent.  

    This is your world These are your people You can live for yourself today Or help build tomorrow for everyone -8.75, -8.00

    by DisNoir36 on Sat Aug 10, 2013 at 05:18:54 AM PDT

  •  BTDT (0+ / 0-)

    My dad had a couple of rental properties in the 80's. That convinced me to never even consider being a landlady.

    My real estate battle tale: When we moved from CO to NC in 2004, our agent (who came highly recommended by a friend) convinced me to list my WWII-era 1000sf ranch for $105K. I bought it for 75K in '96 and did some upgrades, but the kitchen & sole bath still needed work. I was in favor of 99K, just to keep it below that psychological barrier. I wanted a fast, clean break, not to get rich.

    The house was shown exactly twice in the first 90-day listing. I reduced the price a few times, nothing. By then I lived 1000 miles away, the agent got harder and harder to reach. After the second 90 days we decided to drop him, take it off the market for a while, and try in the summer.

    Days before the listing expired, the agent called me with an offer: $78K cash. I jumped on it like a starving fly on steaming shit. A few faxes later and it was a done deal. The relief was exhilarating. The agent was PISSED and was a total asshat to me. Karma taught him a little lesson about greed.

     I can think of no more stirring symbol of man's humanity to man than a fire engine.     -- Kurt Vonnegut

    by SteelerGrrl on Sat Aug 10, 2013 at 12:31:55 PM PDT

  •  The best transaction we had was when we (0+ / 0-)

    gave up renting out DH's family home after 13 years and three trash rehabs because of renters.

    We gutted it, made some nice improvements, and listed with a RE lady, (we don't do RE lawyers in Oregon either). In a summer she showed it eight times.

    We began to try to move people toward her and started using Craigslist, local newspaper and local forums to advertise. We put together better photos and a slide show.

    We finally realized we could sell it better ourselves, and cut her loose after three or four of the best months to sell.

    We did a for sale by owner, even asked a real estate friend to review to see if he could add value, to which he responded, no.

    We took over in September or so, staged and decorated a bit for the holidays; took pictures in the snow; kept everything very fresh.

    Took it off the market for a month during January, then relisted with a new MLS, to get a fresh view on the market then Feb through April were showing it within fifteen minutes of a call. In may we had an offer, countered and came to within 10% of our asking.

    Here's the good part: they were two appraisers who use their home as an office as well.

    We closed without inspection; no bank; just the title company. We did it on a Saturday morning. All the proper papers were filed we got our money; they were ecstatic with the house. We had done everything include pumping the septic tank, they saw the good bones of a 1975 stick built home.

    Science is hell bent on consensus. Dr. Michael Crichton said “Let’s be clear: The work of science has nothing to do with consensus... which is the business of politics. Science, on the contrary, requires only one investigator who happens to be right,”

    by Regina in a Sears Kit House on Sat Aug 10, 2013 at 08:23:02 PM PDT

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