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I was in my early thirties searching for something I had lost without knowing what it was. I packed up my car with some clothes and things I would need for a few days road trip and headed north. North was all I knew about where I was going and the further north the better. There is something about running away that feels empowering when you embark and interestingly, it is a hallmark of depression.

I needed a break from my living situation, my life that was going nowhere and the loss I was experiencing; I needed a break from myself and all the bad decisions I had made leading me to that moment. So I took Highway 1 up the California coast stopping north of Mendocino, just before the highway heads east. The next morning I headed further north, driving most of the day until I hit the redwoods. The drive was an amazing experience, like recovering part of my adulthood I should have already experienced before but had never stopped long enough to embrace. After a couple days of hiking around the trails, I went north again, this time stopping in a little sea side town called Trinidad. I drove along the main road, Patrick’s Point, and decided on a quaint Bed and Breakfast with an ocean view nestled in the trees. I unpacked. I was staying.

Patrick's Point

The coastline here is truly magnificent, it is breathtaking. After getting some rest I hiked down to the beach and began walking along the shore. The rocks surrounded by water were a challenge to climb but it’s amazing what determination and freedom from one's self can generate. I picked my rock, climbed it and took in the view of the horizon in front of me, the water surrounding me, and the trees behind me.

Eternal Disagreement

It was here, atop this rock where it began to come together. The beauty and peace of this place is palpable and I experienced it as liberating. I didn't know it then but the action of climbing that rock was a significant movement that began to push me forward from my place of stillness and sadness; the metaphor of the rock working its way toward my conscious led to the clarity that would soon become my future.

Of course I had to get down and that too was an adventure.

Patrick's Point State Park, Humboldt, CA

A few days later I returned to San Jose. I called my friend, Glen, and we met for dinner. I told him I was planning on returning to school in the fall to get a degree in psychology, but that I wouldn’t be staying in San Jose, I was moving north to enroll at Humboldt State.

What kinds of life experiences helped you moved from a stuck place toward your future? Is there a living metaphor you are aware of?

Kitchen Table Kibitzing is a community series for those who wish to share part of their evening around a virtual kitchen table with kossacks who are caring and supportive of one another. So bring your stories, jokes, photos, funny pics, music, interesting videos, and so forth. Or just say "Hi" if you've had a long day and are too exhausted to participate more actively. We would also appreciate links—including quotations—to diaries, news stories, and books that you think this community would appreciate.

Please note that pie fights will be unwelcome in this community, just as in most other series at DKos. There's lots of space at the rest of the site for fighting with other Democrats, progressives, and liberals, and we don't want those battles dragged into this community.

Finally, readers may notice that most who are posting diaries and comments in this series already know one another to some degree, but that definitely does not mean that newcomers will be excluded or unwelcome. We're happy to welcome guests to our kitchen table, and hope to make some new friends as well.

KTK posts nightly at 5:00 Pacific, 6:00 Mountain, 7:00 Central, 8:00 Eastern.

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