Last night, Jon Stewart covered the cocaine bust of Tea Party Rep. Trey Radel (R-FL).
Here is how badly Rob Ford (audience laughter) has fucked Canada.Video below the fold.
JOHN BERMAN (11/20/2013): So this might come as some welcome news for Toronto this morning. When it comes to cocaine and politics, Canada has no monopoly.Toronto, Canada, is now the go-to shorthand reference for cocaine stories. "Hey, ah, yeah, me and my friends tonight, we're going to Canada, if you know what I mean." (touches nose and sniffs repeatedly) "We're going to go to Canada tonight, you know what I'm talking about? We're going to go to Canada, we're going to get so elected, we're going to get so elected."
But tell me, what political body has joined the Queen City in the electoral nose candy club?JOHN BERMAN (11/20/2013): In about just 30 minutes, a U.S. Congressman is due in court to face a charge of cocaine possession.A U.S. Congress... what? Well, I shouldn't be too surprised, I guess we all remember the Schoolhouse Rock on how a bill becomes a straw.
(audience laughter and applause)
So which Congressman got busted there?NEWS REPORT (11/20/2013): Elected with 62% of the vote in Naples and Fort Myers, Florida. ... Republican Trey Radel.(in Jerry Lewis voice) Trey Radel. Trey Radel was partying with the Chuck Hagel. Elena Kagan!
Were there any signs Radel was a cocaine user?NEWS REPORT (11/20/2013): In this March blog, the Congressman also admitted that his favorite vacation spot is Cartagena, Colombia.(shocked audience laughter)
Any? Were there any signs? Anything? Anything that could've tipped us off that he was a cocaine user? Anything you found? Anything?NEWS REPORT (11/20/2013): Radel, who calls himself a "hip-hop conservative"....(surprised audience laughter)
A hip-hop conservative? That... those... that can't go together. They can't... you can't.... I'm a hip-hop conservative? You can't be. It's not.... I'm a smooth jazz anarchist. It doesn't... you can't.... I'm a disco Nazi! You can't... it doesn't....
How are you a hip-hop conservative?11/20/2013:(stunned audience laughter)
NEWS REPORT: In a recent interview, he breaks down what he says is the conservative message behind Public Enemy's "Fight the Power".
REP. TREY RADEL, R-FL: ... if you really get down to it, in many ways reflects the conservative message of having a heavy-handed federal government.
It has nothing to do with that. It's about entrenched racism. All right, I guess Flava Flav is wearing debt clock. Is that what that is, a debt clock?
And I guess 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy" is an ode to traditional marriage. I guess to learn more, we can get Trey Radel's new book, "I Do Not Understand Rap Music".
Look, we're all human, we all make mistakes. The real problem comes if there's some nugget of hypocrisy involved in Radel's story — say, a use of power to punish others for activities he himself takes part in.NEWS REPORT (11/20/2013): Radel recently supported legislation forcing food stamp recipients to pass a drug test before receiving benefits.Motherfucker! Well, no hypocrisy there, it's not like he receives any taxpayer funding for his salary... oh, right.
So Representative Radel has two choices. He can acknowledge his misbehavior and seek help, or he can deny he's at fault as loudly as possible while knocking over cameramen and elderly legislators. I believe that's known as the "Rob Ford special". Which way is it going to be?NEWS REPORT (11/20/2013): The 37-year-old legislator released a statement saying he's "profoundly sorry to let down his family ... and the people of Southwest Florida". ... He says he knows that he has a problem and "will do whatever is necessary to overcome it".Well, you know what? Good for him. If only he'd made this decision before he got that tattoo.
We'll be right back.