In Citizens United, the SCOTUS infamously ruled that corporations are people. And Mitt "sociopath" Romney said that "corporations are people, my friend". So.... What if corporations were people?
Well, incorporation would be birth. But, then, having an idea for a company and not incorporating.... That would be ABORTION! You would need to be shown the beating heart of your company. Via transcranial ultrasound, of course, because the corporation would exist only in your head.
A merger would be marriage. And so, the merger between e.g. Exxon and Mobil would be same-sex marriage. Still illegal in many places, and not sanctioned by many religious bodies.
A hostile takeover? That would be rape. Illegal.
A leveraged buyout? That would be murder. Also illegal.
And bankruptcy would be suicide. Also illegal.
Yes, if corporations are people then business as we know it cannot be done. In fact, if corporations are people, then one could argue that capitalism is impossible.