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I f you can't be kind begone.

This means no lectures, no condescending  lectures on how you'd handle this oh so much better than I.  You don't know HOW you would handle this situation until you're in it. Moreove, I am not just dealing with my husband's health crisis, I also had to watch my cat die by inches, deal with his dysfunctional family, and have had flashbacks to the death of apparently perfectly husband 30 years ago. So keep your didapproving remarks to yopurself. I simply do nt need more crap thrown at.

In the words of Natalie Maine of the Dixie Chicks,  I am not ready to make nice.If you add to my stress (I think I am at 110% capacity already). Don't think thios is political enough for your taste? DON'T BLOODY READ IT.  You'd also be wrong because Markos himsel has said this is a community and the personal and non-political stuff is what binds us together so we can act on the political stuff.

The news just keeps getting worse.

I wasn't there today. I have a foot issue which is extremely painful Basically the burning/tingling pain (like what you feel when you have very severe chillblains) starts on either my big or little toe, moves halfway up my foot. Then it stops for 4-10 breaths (yes, I counted).  It's impossible to function, so I take half a muscle relaxant and sleep through it. It lasts 18-24 hours. I told Ben and he said to stay home. MiL went.

The news she reported was not good.  Not at all.  

His left leg with the clot is swollen. They're doing another X-Ray.

And MiL learned this morning he'd had or still had pneumonia.   Wow. Nobody even told Ben till today. Isn't that the sort of thing family should be inmormed of??????

And his nurse thinks he needs Zoloft because of personality changes.  I am gonna fight the Zoloft because the side effects are not pretty.  She has "noticed" that there are behavioral changes. Um. dearie, he had open heart surgery, is in a lot of pain and he always shows fear as anger. Nothing new here.  ANd if you think there are changes, why not ASK the person who's been married to him for 15 years? DOn't you think I might just know a little more about normal behavior his than you? AN don't you think you could have discussed this with me YESTERDAY when I spoke to you?

And at this point I no longer trust anybody in that hospital. Apparently they don't feel the need to tell patient or family what's going on. MiL doesn't know the questions to ask and won't fight to get the answers. Maybe they think they're just not giving you bad news when nothing much can be done. MiL won't fight for real ansers. I WILL>

I'll be as nice as I can be, but I WILL get answers.

Vetwife I understand what you've had to do even better than I did after dealing with Dad's hospitalizations..

I intend to march in with a notebook, force the nurse tio sit down with me, and I am going to ask every last question I can think of, including WHY THE FUCK DIDN"T THEY CALL ME ABOUT PNEUMONIA??????

I will keep going up ther hierarch as high as necessary till I get real answers,not soothing cliches.

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