If technology fails you, try something simple:
Malaysian officials, already struggling with their public images after a jetliner with 239 people on board went missing, have been further embarrassed after a team of witch doctors performed rituals at the Kuala Lumpur International Airport to find the missing Boeing 777.They were invited by the government, and I predict they'll have at least as much success as everybody else has had so far...
Using bamboo as "binoculars" and smacking the ground, Zin and others performed rituals that included a flying carpet and a magic boat...Link
"I think the plane is still in the air or has crashed into the sea," he was quoted in Free Malaysia Today.
Any way you slice it he has a great chance of being right.
Personally, I'm glad we are too advanced in the U.S. to have some "Special Representative" of some nebulous cloud being chanting nonsense in an attempt to reorder the real world.