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That's a line from a Bowie song, don't panic.

There's plenty of chaos going on here though, more below the dooblydoo.

So I won my case.  This has had exactly zero impact on my life.  It seems that the earliest I will see any funds will be at the end of May - so if I'm going to get my home in any kind of order - I have to beat feet and get to Oregon pretty much as soon as that happens, my hopes of getting my chest done before I go have been put on hold.  It's only been 30 years, what's a few more, right?  It's also still unclear how much money I will get monthly or in backpay, so there is no way to plan for the future in a concrete way, I just have to sort of lowball it and guess.  I have had my interview for SSI, but the caseworker won't return any calls, so again I'm up in the air on that too.

My kidneys have taken a dive in terms of function, they are at about 50% of where they should be as of the last tests - so I'm having an ultrasound and some other stuff I'm not sure about done in early April in hopes of shedding some light on what is going on.  It looks like my attempt to lose weight via an Atkin's like programme may have done some serious damage at this point, so I'm off that, and gaining back the 12lbs I lost.

I may also have diverticulitis, because potential kidney failure isn't fun enough.  So I've done a round of antibiotics for that to knock out any infection and I will eventually have a butt camera to confirm or deny as well.  Again, that will happen when it happens, as all major medical testing and such has to be run through the local university hospital, where I have indigent care - so it has to be major, and it has to be requested multiple times before they will actually schedule it.  Damn you, Bobby Jindal, and your refusal to expand Medicaid to poor people!

And just for fun, a friend of my Mum's has gotten out of the mental hospital (she ran out of days, not because she was better) and stayed with us overnight, before being moved back into her own apartment.  We don't have the same problems, but on the plus side, Mum is really glad I'm pro medication and take them twice a day like I'm supposed to every day.  On the downside, she calls about 10 times a day on average and it's really riling Mum up - and she has to point her anger and aggression somewhere.  So I make sure I stay in my room even more now, because I don't want to be on the receiving end of that.

The cats are cats, the use of my door as a toilet has ramped up for some reason, even Nigel wants to go home.  He spends his time trying to sleep on me and has this knack for wanting to lie down on my lower ribs, making it hard to breathe.  I already use a CPAP because I have breathing issues while sleeping, and somehow his TARDIS like butt weighs more than his entire body - and he parks it right in the spot most likely to interfere with breathing.  Because cat.  Poor kid, I want to go home too.

ColCatLady has turned 70 now, and his drinking has ramped up.  I guess he's decided that he can just do whatever he wants now that he's "old" - and drinking himself to death seems to be his plan.  He's got some kind of Viet Nam reunion thingy coming up next month he's going to - and while that will be good, it will also be bad - because he will come back drinking all the harder because of the people who weren't there.  Since he has no self identification outside of "soldier" as his friends age and die he feels that he's being abandoned.  And that and cats are all that matters to him.

I'm anxious to get home, to get started, to get finished - to finally be back in my place, to have it finished out the way it should be, safe and secure and orderly, I like order - but mostly just to be home where I feel safe and not under siege all the time.  I have a tonne of plans for the boat refit, things I want to do to make it safer and better, more valuable and attractive - and homey too.  There is a lot of work to be done, so that window where it's not pissing rain is important, I have to really seize the time and use it.  I feel confidant I can get it all done, well, all but the enclosure for the cockpit - I'll need some professional help for that most likely - but it's going to take time and I'm dying to get moving already.

The car needs work too - that has to be done before I can go.  I'll need new shocks and struts and the AC fixed, the oil changed and the cabin air filter replaced at a minimum - the driver side window motor needs replacing as well.  The mould spores in the air here have become a MAJOR problem for me, we have a drainage ditch in our front lawn that is just a mess and the car sits out front to keep CCL from blocking me in all the time.  CCL got the transmission taken care of, and the engine can go a lot longer - but those other things will make it much nicer to drive loaded across the US in a couple of days.  I don't screw around, I drive. I'm headed across Texas to pick up the sailing buddy in AZ (yes, that's happening for a lot of reasons, mostly because you don't abandon your friends when they are in the shit) and up the west coast - there will be some long haul days in there, but it will be worth it to get home.

So...yeah.  That's the news from the swamp.  I want to go clean up a filthy boat. Yesterday.

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