What is this burgeoning, irrational, one-size-fits-all legal defense now increasingly employed by American elites? You know, the defense where some aggrieved billionaire or corporation or conservative interest group files a lawsuit to thwart democracy and equal rights, on the breathtakingly broad, ill-applied basis that their free speech is being curtailed.
Latest example: Upset at Seattle's new $15 per hour minimum wage, a lobbying group representing fast-food purveyors like McDonald’s and Taco Bell filed a lawsuit asking courts to repeal the legislation because -- they allege, in part -- the ordinance violates the First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution. You see, "by increasing the labor costs" of fast-food franchisees, the ordinance "will reduce their ability to dedicate funding to the promotion of their businesses and brands.” Free speech! Slam dunk! Game over!
Speaking of slam dunk, just before the Seattle lawsuit, billionaire Donald Sterling sued the National Basketball Association for ordering the sale of the team he owns after he was caught making racially charged statements in violation of NBA policies. The sharing of his comments, his lawyers claim, violated his free speech civil rights! It's about the freedom! All the time, without exceptions!
Before Sterling's decreasingly novel application of the law, lawyers for Eric O'Keefe, a director of the Koch-affiliated Wisconsin Club for Growth -- an "educational," "not-for-profit," "tax-exempt" interest group that spends lots of money on what looks an awful lot like political campaign advertising -- filed suit against Wisconsin prosecutors investigating possible illegal campaign collusion between the club, other similar groups and the campaign of Gov. Scott Walker. O’Keefe’s lawyer argues the probe violates his clients' First Amendment rights to freedom of speech and association and must be shut down at once. Before a federal appeals court intervened, a Bush-appointed, conservative-activist federal judge was happy to concur on O'Keefe's behalf, even ordering the destruction of evidence already collected in the case. Free speech!
Apparently, being investigated by officers of the state as part of a properly constituted and duly sanctioned criminal inquiry is a violation of a suspect's First Amendment right to free speech -- even before the investigation can be concluded, much less lead to charges. You are innocent of any crimes you might later be charged with, and you can't ever be proved guilty, because the investigation itself would curtail your ability to yak it up all you want, in any way you like. As for illegal collusion: Trumped by ... free speech!
While that political dust-up proceeds, food and petroleum industry trade groups in several states have attempted to impose statutory gag orders against anyone who dares criticize their products, or who tries to make public a list of potentially harmful ingredients in those products. Because, all of that information is privileged, trade secrets even, and the businesses have a right to privacy! Never mind if commercial interests and their products are hurting people! The public doesn't have a right to know that! But what about their First Amendment rights? Well, snoopy citizens oughta be careful asking too many questions, or they might get sued just for talking about it!
Before those developments, the conservative majority on the U.S. Supreme Court determined in a couple of landmark cases that -- at least for political campaign purposes -- money in this country equals speech. Moreover, organizations and corporations are pretty much to be regarded as individual citizens when it comes to free speech protections. Which concept an increasing number of those institutions clearly are taking to heart, and in a hurry. By the way, giant corporate mergers that result in monopolies or duopolies are none of your damn business, either. Besides, too big to fail is good for you!
Of course, when "free" speech is perceived as the equivalent of money, how can it possibly be free? Especially when the money-changers are so busy spending so much of their lucre to stifle the speech of others, while widening their own.
What's wrong with this picture? Where's the free speech of 99 percent of Americans left in all of this? Answer: In the virtual equivalent of one of those new-fangled free-speech restriction zones, where the fences are not only getting taller but also are now topped with loud megaphones that boom at we occupants.
So, do whatever you like, because ... free speech! Or more accurately: Do whatever you like, but only if you have the money to buy enough speech, and enough money to reinterpret the law more to your own liking and profit. Everyone else can go suck air.