Appearing on SiriusXM’s “The Wilkow Majority,” Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-TX) argued, “if you’re Commander-in-Chief you can’t be listening to Muslim brother advice on when it’s time to stop destroying Muslim brothers.”I realize that part of the duties of being America's Dumbest Congressman, Bar None, For Now And Goddamn Ever is to regularly pipe up with things that you can usually only hear from drunken racist grandpas, but seriously—if this could just wait a bit, that would be wonderful.
The comment was a reference to the Texas congressman’s theory that the U.S. government has been infiltrated by the Muslim Brotherhood, a group that Egypt recently opted to reclassify as a terrorist organization. In 2012, Gohmert joined a small group of conservative lawmakers led by Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN) to demand that the Inspectors General of four government agencies investigate “deep penetration” by the Muslim Brotherhood in the U.S. government.
Gohmert, who had previously claimed that the organization also caused the administration to bungle the investigation into the 2013 Boston bombings, went on to argue that “six top advisers to President Obama are Muslim brothers.” “These are the advisers who have opened doors for them to the president himself,” he said. “This is the kind of stuff that has to stop if we’re really going to deal with radical Islam.”Again, I am very sorry, but we really need you to be a conspiratorial racist shitstain some other time. We've got Fox News talking heads telling America that the only way to deal with Muslims is to put bullets in their heads, we've got law enforcement officials in St. Louis reenacting the con side of the civil rights movement on a nightly basis—we are full up right now. Give us a few weeks, a month at most, and then I promise you can reach right up your ample colon and pull out every last one of your lovely racist dumb-ass drunk-ass meth-tweaking paint-drinking worst-district-in-Texas Drudge-report-reading fencepost-licking barn-animal-punching hair-pulling nose-picking McCarthy-humping Illuminati-fearing scab-eating eau-de-paste conspiracy rants you want and we will all give you the proper amount of attention again.
But if you could just shut your stupid Muslims-are-hiding-in-the-White-House-closets mouth for one damn month, you barely photosynthesizing half-cabbage, we would all appreciate it very damn much.