Adrian Peterson beat his kid with a switch. He was indicted for his actions, found guilty in a plea deal of misdemeanor reckless assault, and must pay $4000 and perform 80 hours of community service. He said to reporters that he was glad the whole affair is now behind him; he wants to move forward. That’s exactly what should happen. But in their unceasing effort to appear as though they care about people, the disingenuous NFL has climbed high up on its politically correct high horse and suspended Peterson for at least the rest of the year. In Scalia's America, the NFL's America, justice can no longer prevail. And as we were collectively prepared to move forward, to thank Adrian Peterson for allowing us a forum through which to discuss using violence to solve problems, the NFL caught us up short with their draconian punishment. Now? The talk is going to be about the punishment, not the underlying crime. It's the corporate America equivalent of beating your kid with a switch. Let's begin the conversation anyway.
A few days after Peterson was found out, Charles Barkley argued that if we were to lock up everyone who switches their child, then we'd have to incarcerate nearly every black parent in the South. Now Charles Barkley is a bright man who speaks his mind; he’s one of the best sports commentators we have. But he’s only thought this one half through: To extend Barkley's contention to its logical, though absurd, conclusion would be to argue that, were we Nazi Germany in the 1930's and 40's, killing Jews must be all right; otherwise, we’d have to lock up all the Nazis in Germany. To beat and lynch African Americans in the South for 400 years must have been all right, otherwise we would have had to lock up every racist from Louisiana to South Carolina. No Charles, if a behavior is wrong, if it is violent and rooted in ignorance, anger or hatred, then it is wrong, and it should desist. Beating our children is an act of violence, and it has no place in a civilized society. There is a better way.
As an educator of nearly 40 years, I can tell you for a fact that children can be managed and taught and reprimanded without even raising your voice. In fact, raising your voice tells the child that you are angry, which deflects the situation from them and their behavior. The proper course of action is not really arguable. Every childhood development specialist in the world knows what to do, and we have for decades: From early childhood, a parent or caregiver needs to set clear parameters for a child, limits for their behavior. These rules range from table manners to interactions with others and every imaginable behavior in between. These rules should be clear and they should be enforced consistently and without fail. If a child steps over a specified limit, the parent should calmly describe the infraction and tell the child exactly what will happen if the behavior persists…e.g… “You have taken your sister’s toy without asking her, and you need to give it back by the count of three, or you will spend five minutes in your time-out chair.” The time out chair should be in a private corner somewhere, and while the child is in the chair, they should know that if they cry or turn around or talk, the time for their five minutes will begin again until they get it right. If the parent does this consistently from an early age, there will be no testing, no problem whatsoever, and the behavior will desist immediately. Even more important, children will learn to monitor their own behaviors. Now if a parent doesn’t start this routine until the child is 5 or 6, there will be a longer, more aggravating testing period involved. But it is never too late to start. The key is to remain calm and consistent. Some parents allow a behavior to persist until they are so annoyed they explode and switch the child. That, frankly, is the easy, lazy way out. It takes more energy to set limits and enforce those limits consistently and without violence. But it is much better for your child’s development if you do. You love them. It’s worth the extra effort.
If it is true that nearly every black parent in the south today beats their child, then I offer a sincere thanks to you, Adrian Peterson, for bringing this into the light. We can do better. Move over, Commissioner Goodell and the falsely righteous NFL. You should have allowed Adrian to play ball, and the conversation rightly would have turned to his underlying crime. Now? Business as usual.
Haldon Richardson is a teacher and a writer for sportsblog.com. Please like him on Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/... on Google + at: https://plus.google.com/... and on twitter at: https://twitter.com/...