If you have -- Quick, what were its main points? ... And what did Bill Nye say?
JOHN OLIVER: The Earth. You might now it as that blue thing Bruce Willis is always trying to save or from its famous collaboration with the Wind and Fire or just simply as that place where George Clooney lives. Anyway, the earth had some genuinely bad news this week.
REPORTER: A White House report that says global warming threatens every part of the US.
OBAMA: This isn’t something in the distant future, climate change is already affecting us now
JOHN OLIVER: Now! Smart move, Obama. That is a key shift in how to talk about climate change, ‘cos we’ve all proven that we cannot be trusted with the future tense. We’ve been repeatedly asked, Don’t you want to leave a better earth for your grandchildren, and we’ve all collectively responded, Nyeh, fuck ‘em. But, incredibly, this latest damning scientific report may still face an uphill climb with some of us.
REPORTER: There’s a Gallup poll that came out last month which found one in four Americans is skeptical of all the effects of climate change and thinks this issue’s been exaggerated.
JOHN OLIVER: Who gives a SHIT! That doesn’t matter. You don’t need people’s opinions on a fact. You might as well have a poll asking which number is bigger, 15 or 5? or do owls exist? or, are there hats? The debate on climate change should not be whether or not it exists, it’s what we should do about it. There is a mountain of research on this topic. Global temperatures are rising, heat waves are becoming more common, sea surface temperatures are also rising, glaciers are melting and of course, no climate report is complete without the obligatory polar bear balancing on a piece of ice. the only accurate way to report that one out of four Americans are skeptical of global warming is to say, a poll finds that one out of four Americans are wrong about something because a survey of thousands of scientific papers that took a position on climate change found that 97 percent endorsed the position that humans are causing global warming. And I think I know why people still think this issue is open to debate, because on TV, it is. And it’s always one person for, one person against. And it’s usually the same person for.
REPORTER: Billy Nye and Marsha Blackburn, welcome both of you to Meet The Press.
REPORTER: Bill Nye joins us now along with climate change skeptic Mark Moran
REPORTER: Joining me now to your head to head, Bill Nye, science educator, CEO of the Planetary Society.
REPORTER: In the crossfire, Bill Nye, the Science Guy. Bill Nye, the Science Guy, believes in man-made global warming.
JOHN OLIVER: That’s right. More often than not, it’s Bill Nye, the Science Guy versus some dude, and when you look at the screen it’s 50-50, which is inherently misleading. If there has to be a debate about the reality of climate change -- and there doesn’t -- there is only one mathematically fair way to do it.
VOICEOVER: Last Week Tonight presents a statistically representative climate change debate.
JOHN OLIVER: Good evening. Joining me tonight, a climate change denier and, naturally, Bill Nye, the Science Guy.
BILL NYE: John, humans are causing climate change, no question.
JOHN OLIVER: Wait wait wait wait wait. Before we begin, in the interest of mathematical balance, I’m going to bring out two people who agree with you, climate skeptic. And Bill Nye, I’m also going to bring out 96 other scientists. It’s a little unwieldy but it’s the only way we can actually have a representative discussion. so please file in. Again, this is going to make the debate difficult. We shouldn’t really be having it in the first place, but … so … representationally, climate skeptic please make a case against climate change.
SKEPTIC: Well, I just don’t think all the science is in yet, is settled.
JOHN OLIVER: Okay, and what is the overwhelming view of the entire scientific community.
(Many voices)
JOHN OLIVER: I can’t hear you over the weight of scientific evidence. This whole debate should not have happened. I apologize to everyone at home, my thanks to Bill Nye and the overwhelming scientific consensus.