I've watched with some interest the "new atheist movement." There's very little of it that's "new" to me. I heard it all when I was a kid. Unlike many vocal atheists of today, I was never a believer and therefore don't have the unbridled enthusiasm of a convert. I don't have the hunger to beat up on believers and I hardly think they all deserve to be put in the same boat. As I've grown older and been exposed to people on four continents, I've softened my attitudes toward faith and those that have it.
How I've gotten here I will share below the squiggle.
CHAPTER 1
My father is not only one of the most moralistic (to a fault) people I know, but his extreme atheism shaped my childhood world view, and pushed me toward a conservative political bent (yes, those two things existed together in our heads—hard to fathom now.) My dad was far from perfect. He inherited his bigotry toward African-Americans from his life circumstances, and his hatred of Catholics from some early childhood trauma (no, not that—at least not that I know of anyway.) His parents were religious enough to have him baptized, but that was something that wouldn't happen to his sons.
My mother—who might be up for sainthood for putting up with all this—was quietly religious, but never exerted her belief or tried to force it upon us. I remember going to Sunday school and to a few Easter morning services with her and grandma, but compared to the vocal way in which dad shared his disbelief, these traditions hadn't really any chance to take hold.
Given that background, it was only natural that I should take up the mantel of angry atheist and challenge my believing friends about their faith at every opportunity. "Prove there's a god," I must have said a thousand times from late elementary through early high school. I must say, I don't really think I was mature enough to understand what I was asking.
At university my classes were filled with people like me. I met my first "atheist Jew." He might as well have been a unicorn to this sheltered midwestern boy. I had a black roommate for a quarter and even a gay roommate (not that I knew it at the time) for several years. Several of the people I got to know who were religious simply confirmed my father's assertion that all religious people were hypocrites and criminals. "Sin all week long and then get forgiven on Sunday," was how he described them. Their "sins," I now know, were minor offenses, but I was raised in a very strict household, i.e., I had a very serious stick up my butt.
CHAPTER 2
After college I received the opportunity to go to work for a small company in Japan. It was great, fulfilling all my fantasies about exotic travel to foreign lands. The first few months of my stay, I lived with my boss and his wife and was treated to a total immersion course in Japanese culture.
I learned about Buddhist temples (for funerals—I would attend my future father-in-law's not long after arriving) and Shinto shrines (for 3-5-7 birthday celebrations, New Years, and weddings—I would have my own in one before moving back to the states two and a half years later.) But, what blew me away was that the Japanese seemed totally at ease living with both of these faith traditions as part of their lives—even having miniature shrines to each in their homes. It was nothing to see a salaryman stop to pray at both the local shrine and the local temple on the way from the train station to home. My only other experience with religion, the "Jesus or be damned" Christian-centric American kind, left me unprepared for a faith that was so open and tolerant. I found this world view astonishing—and liberating.
The second part of my spiritual awakening had nothing to do with Japan at all; it was through my hunger for books. I wanted to read in my language, and I would take anything I could get. On one trip to the foreign language bookstore, I wandered into the religious books section and was introduced for the first time to someone who would become one of my favorite people—Karen Armstrong. My paperback version of The History of God accompanied me on my train commute for the next four months. Here was a discussion of god(s) that was neither preachy nor apologetic. It expanded my knowledge of what religion is and how it came to be.
CHAPTER 3
I have since read almost everything Armstrong has published, and I'm convinced that she'll come around to my view of the world eventually. Regardless of that, her introduction on the subject opened the door to reading a lot about religion and philosophy, (and she eventually would write a biography of Buddha.) I've also read most of the new atheist tracks—Hitchens, Dawkins, Harris—and have listened to my share of atheist podcasts and Bill Maher. I must say—they're beginning to bore me.
I've attended peace conferences about the middle east, and participated in non-violence training with old-school civil rights pastors and nuns. I've learned that my previous view of the world as binary was only half right. The world isn't divided between Christians and non-Christians, it's divided between those who thirst for progressive social justice and those who have soured on the bitter drink of exclusion, believing that their way is the only way, condemning anyone who thinks otherwise. I think some converts to Atheism have carried that mindset with them from their previous faith tradition.
Oh, another life changing moment from Japan—that gay roommate from college came out while I was there. I'd never really had an opinion about homosexuals before, and I was instantly converted into an LGBT ally. I wish everyone could meet a person who was a friend first and gay later, it would make a big difference in how they view the whole homosexuality thing.
I've met Christians on both sides of the LGBT rights battle since 2004 when my state voted to make marriage exclusive to a man and a woman. It has deepened my conviction that how you read your scriptures says more about you than it says about your scriptures. My atheist dad is on the side of conservative Christians on this one. We tend not to bring it up at holiday gatherings, but it shows that being religious or not is not an indicator of your views on social issues.
CONCLUSION
So, what is this diary really about then? What has my journey taught me that I think is worth sharing with you? Let me give you my own philosophy and you can see if you agree with any of my points:
1. The Golden Rule in all it's forms is a pretty darn good way in which to lead your life. Rabbi Hillel had it right when he was asked to recite the Torah while standing on one foot—"That which is hateful to you, do not do to your fellow. That is the whole Torah; the rest is the explanation; go and learn it."
2. This one is more metaphysical: The whole of life can be explained with the circle—life cycles, orbits, atoms and cells, planets and suns; even DNA is just a couple of stretched out intertwined circles. And think about how most philosophies fit on a circle. When you take a progressive ideology and a conservative ideology and stretch them both far enough around the circle, don't they both meet again back at fascism? Full circle.
Okay, I'm still working on that one.
2b. We all have an afterlife in what we leave behind: our good works, our fiends, our children, our molecules. What more can we hope for? See, circle.
3. Don't argue from the point of view of something you don't believe in. I have come to believe this more and more as I hear secular folks try to convert the faithful to their point of view by using scripture (usually the bible.) Why would I argue about what the bible says when I don't believe it's anything more than literature? If you want to argue philosophically, do it from a neutral spot. Right is right because it's right. No need to bring Leviticus into it.
4. Take what's good and dump the rest. Every culture, philosophy and religion has some worthy values, usually told in the form of stories. My favorite story of the Prophet Mohammad is a hadith about a woman who had been pelting him with garbage ever day from her second story window and then suddenly stops. He inquires about her to a neighbor only to find out she is ill. He checks in on her to make sure she is okay. If only this example of tolerance and forgiveness was the primary lesson about Islam taught in every mosque. Again, how you read your holy book says a lot about you. I also like the stories of Dr. Seuss and Charles Schultz. The Lorax, anyone? He speaks for the trees.
5. If a non-personal, indescribable god was good enough for Einstein, who am I to think I can improve on that.
So, I guess what I want to impart most from my journey is that atheism is but one of many world views in which you can be a good person. It just happens to be the one I'm in. If you're new to this whole (lack of) faith thing, take it from someone who's been here awhile—be patient with the others who haven't found their way here yet. Try to meet them where they are. There's a good chance they may never make it. It doesn't mean they're bad people. Their actions will tell you whether they are or not, not what deity they pray to.
Do unto others and all that jazz.
Peace.