How easy is it to pass a judgment on someone? What do you think when you see a person with a weight problem? What's your knee jerk reaction to someone on the street in torn, dirty, disheveled clothes? The person driving the car in front of you can barely see over the steering wheel or has grey hair are you immediately impatient? That person is retarded or learning disabled so therefore they have no talents or usefulness. She's mentally ill so there is no validity to anything she says. She has really short hair or he has an effeminate voice so of course they're gay. Their skin is brown, does that make them a Muslim terrorists, a drug addict or dealer, a gang member? They are an illegal immigrant so automatically they don't belong here, all they want is a handout. The man begging in the grocery store lobby definitely looks like a crack addict. If we're honest we all pass judgements every day. It's what we do with them that matters.
So your neighbor is obese, the house is in disrepair, and the lawn is rarely mowed. Do you think, "Lazy self indulgent bastard is ruining my property values!" Or do you consider the possibilities that his weight issues may be due to a medical condition, medication, or emotional issues? Maybe his house is in disrepair because his medical issues and the cost of his medications make it difficult to even put food on the table. Maybe he's not physically able or it's not advisable for him to mow his lawn. Have you offered to help with his lawn?
Do you give dirty looks to someone who enters a restaurant with dirty clothes and disheveled hair? Maybe they had car trouble and had to get on their hands and knees in the cold dirty snow. And on top of that they are diabetic and entering a low blood sugar episode and need something to eat fast. Or maybe they are simply unconcerned with societal norms, expectations, and trappings and they spent the day busting there ass putting in a garden and they are starving and to tired to be bothered.
One of my pet peeves is other drivers. I have very little patience for idiotic unsafe drivers. I will be the first to admit that I immediately cop an attitude when I get behind a slow moving car and I can't see the drivers head or their hair is white. But when you think about it, how many times have you been passed unsafely by some idiot that only managed to get one or to cars ahead of you and stopped at the same light. Yesterday my passenger encouraged me to blow my horn at an elderly person making an excruciatingly slow turn. I exercised restraint realizing that it would probably only make them even more nervous. I will not pretend that me and my horn are strangers, but there are times when prudence is called for. There does come a time when a person is to old and unsafe to be driving. I just hope I'm dead before I get there.
As for labeling people as gay, so what! It's a fact of life! Get over it! I discovered, after the fact, that my high school friends were discussing the fact that I was gay long before it ever occurred to me. I also have a friend who's ex husband committed suicide in part because he was harassed his entire life because he wasn't a "macho" man and people picked on him for being gay. He wasn't!
I had occasion to give a man begging in the grocery store lobby my last 50 cents. Later that day I read an unrelated comment by an acquaintance that he no longer gives to beggars because the last time he did he watched them get into a limmo. There are always going to be people who abuse the system whatever it is. I don't believe the people who really need it are the ones who should suffer. The man in the grocery "looked" like he could have been a drug addict. I gave $10 once to a couple on a street corner with a "hungry" sign. They looked like they could have been drug addicts or alcoholics. But here we go making assumptions again. And so what if they were. They might need that drink or that fix just as bad as they need a sandwich. It makes me think about that saying about giving without the expectation of anything in return. What's the return here? Feeling good you fed someone vs. bad you supported a drug addiction? That's none of my business. The point was to help someone in need.
Are the seemingly incoherent ramblings or feelings of a mentally ill or learning disabled individual any less valid. I don't think so. Sometimes it's hard to discern reality or significance, but it's important to remember that it is their reality! It's also important to remember that there may be a very real issue that needs attention.
I am disgusted by the vilification of our President and the Muslim or Islamic culture! First of all the two do not go hand in hand! Barack Obama is a self avowed Christian who's mother raised him to be "spiritual". And you can't condemn an entire culture for the atrocities committed by extremist terrorists! The fear of someone who looks different or has a different skin color is deep seated and based on shallow assumptions, prejudices, and outright lies. There are those who delight in feeding these fears which is generally just as sick and twisted as the extremist terrorists.
Which brings me to the issue of immigration and the current witch hunt. I mean really! We are a country of immigrants! Except for the peoples we stole the land from. Take the west for instance, the majority of it was taken from Mexico! And look what we did and continue to do to the Native Americans! Once again it's lies and stereotypes pounded into the heads of the fearful that perpetuate these animosities. There are those who defend their condemnation with the excuse that "we" didn't commit those atrocities. "There is no one alive today who did." I ask them, does that mean it's ok to turn a blind eye and commit new atrocities?
It's human nature as well as self preservation to judge and assess any given situation. It's what you do with it that matters.