We realized years ago that we could not win the Gerrymander War in the House, that state legislative Republicans were entrenched, and that a victory for Hillary would only bring grief as Capitol Hill Republicans would obstruct relentlessly and investigate non-scandals with a ferver that would dwarf Benghazi (!).
So what to do? Easy: Recruit a mole, a “Republican” who’d be so odious, so obnoxious, so unhinged, so bigoted, so incompetent that Base Republicans would fall... utterly... in... love with him and vote for him in droves!
The plot, the conspiracy was not without risks: It would mean sacrificing both a Supreme Court seat, and self-sabotaging just enough Electoral College states/votes to defeat the best and most qualified candidate for President in decades. But Hillary was always a team player and has always put her country before herself (God love her!). Plus, she headed up the whole operation.
In the end, we put our mole in the White House. And the plan’s working like a charm: Capitol Hill Republicans are either wholly confused or eating their own (or both); Putin actually thinks he’s pulling the strings (that Soviet fuckhead’s too clever by half); and Country Club Republicans are rather adrift, not knowing whether to back Nazis or stay reeeaaallll quiet.
Anyway, we’re not out of the woods, yet. But the plan’s working wonders and our chief operative is excelling in destroying the Republican Party from inside! Like a ravenous worm in a soft apple!
Also, Democrats, Liberals, are coming together like they haven’t done in years.
Hang in there, people. Hang in there...