To begin, I must preface my solution to America’s skyrocketing gun violence, the opioid epidemic and the rise of Fake News with a couple of hard facts about my integrity and moral character.
I have been called a habitual liar. Some have even tagged me as a pathological liar. I have cheated on my ex-wife. Many times. I once declared bankruptcy and a few small business owners that counted on the money I owed them couldn’t feed their families.
And finally, although I am a recipient of the du-Pont Columbia for Excellence in Journalism, I am also a recovering heroin-addict-junkie that robbed my family of anything worth value.
That said, I am the perfect candidate to offer a failsafe plan on how we can Make America Great Again.
First, I think we all can agree on one thing, regardless if there were 28 school shootings since January 1st or three school shootings, one is too many.
If we as a nation want to find a solution to the senseless massacre of unarmed children by an individual carrying a killing machine that was designed by the manufacturer for warzones, we cannot get tangled in the web of semantics.
Let’s look at this logically.
2.7 million service members have been to the war zones of Iraq and Afghanistan since 2001. The United States military has already trained these young men and women. Many have already killed in combat.
The unemployment rate for this generation of veterans has been substantially higher than the overall veteran rate. Among the 453,000 unemployed veterans in 2016, 60 percent were age 45 and over, 36 percent were age 25 to 44, and 4 percent were age 18 to 24.
Therefore, it makes perfect sense to use these trained soldiers to guard every school, that is, every kindergarten, every college and every University, in the entire United States.
Think of it, a newly employed veteran at each door, at each possible point of attack, on constant rotation, for lunch, for bathroom breaks, or for logistics meetings.
Wouldn’t you feel safe just knowing your child will be protected by soldiers carrying automatic weapons with full metal jackets dressed completely in body armor?
But I would take it one step further. I would shift all the money we saved on benefits for unemployed veterans, and use it to train and arm every mentally stable teacher and professor in America.
In doing so, you would provide a second wall of protection that would account for any unpredictable event of human error, such as a guard having sex with a teacher or high school student while on duty, or maybe even a guard nodding out on opioids.
Bingo! 100 percent guaranteed! The senseless killing of young children will stop.
Do you know why, because regardless of the 54 million dollars our trusted, loyal Congressional Delegation took from the NRA in 2016 to protect our God-given 2nd Amendment right, armed veterans and teachers packing a sidearm will without any room for intelligent debate, stop an 18-year-old boy in Florida from buying an AR-15 and mowing down 17 children.
To digress, I’ve read the conspiracy theories about Las Vegas and now stunning posts on Facebook asking to “show us the bodies of the 17 dead in Florida.” That somehow this recent massacre has been fabricated by “snowflakes” and Crooked Hillary Democrats in an attempt to strip the NRA of its colossal hold on America.
My answer to ending this conspiracy in its tracks is visual and simple. Use the FBI agents that are wasting all their time on this fake Russian nonsense to track down those involved in the conspiracy and show them pictures of the body of a young boy or girl riddled with bullets.
I covered the war in Bosnia. I have seen what a piece of metal can do to human flesh. All we need to do is show this group of extremely intelligent conspiracy theorist a body with a giant sucking wound, intestines leaking from lower stomach wounds, or brain tissue oozing out of tiny entry hole, and they would be forever enlightened.
Now let me tackle the solution to ending the opioid addict.
First thing first, three strikes and you are out. I am calling it right here. Forget about saving these junkies’ lives if they just want to keep getting high.
In the name of public health, why should we put our emergency first responders who entered their profession to “protect and save” at risk saving an addicts’ life for the 3rd time in a week?
Just let them die. That’s how we eliminate the worst health crisis in America’s history. Why should good Americans have to pay to rehabilitate these bad Americans? Good Americans raise good children. Only bad kids like me grow up to be junkies and liars.
Besides, God left America’s fabric years ago. We shouldn’t go by the old standard of letting only God decides who lives and who dies. Now we should put that decision in the hands of good Americans who elect good politicians.
Okay, now that we have elevated the opioid overdose body count from 182 per day to maybe 400 per days with the Three Strikes and You Die, Rule, we can get to the plan that will end all opioids entering the United States from Mexico.
A few years ago, I did a story out of Brownsville, Texas. I spent time with a “mule” from one of the Mexican Cartels. Now in that eye-opening week, I learned that 95% of the opioids enter the United States via tunnels. He told me that for every tunnel the US Border Patrol discovers, construction begins on two additional tunnels at record speed.
Forget the wall and take half the budget proposed to build it and carpet bomb the border with GBU-43 bombs, nicknamed the "mother of all bombs." In fact, send in massive amounts of camera crews to film the US Air Force dropping this “mother of all bombs” the entire length of our Southern Mexican border.
Just think, really imagine for a moment, a “super-double-secret-parade” with world-ending nuclear weapons on flat trucks rolling down Pennsylvania Avenue as giant moving billboards display footage from the day the United States of America blew up the opioid epidemic.
Finally, Fake News. Forget about it. The answer is simple. Close down every news agency in America but one. Yes, unfortunately, there is only one professional major news agency that gives Americans the truth. We all know it! There is no debate.
If we make it a crime and use ICE to arrest anybody that watches Morning Joe, CNN, ABC, NBC, CBS or for that matter, anything but Fox News, we will Make America Great Again.
(Note: This piece in no way intends to disrespect the 17 students who were massacred at Stoneman Douglas High School, their grieving families, or the families of those who have buried a loved one as a result of the opioid epidemic.)