We all know that Independence Day means retail in this great land of ours—meaning fireworks, hot dogs, and sales at the mall. Why would our huckster-in-chief be any different? If you go to shop online at the Donald Trump store right now you will see a big banner proclaiming 40 percent off if you use the promo code “Freedom.”
You get it? I’ll use it in a sentence for you. Immigrant children and their parents separated and detained have no “freedom.”
What can you get 40 percent off of? Hats, of course. A Make America Great Again golf driver bootie. A Trump/Pence beer glass, so your friends know you are indeed the sack of shit everybody says you are. Tired of people telling you that your ideas are baseless, and then they spout off all of these facts? Buy a Trump/Pence Mini Megaphone and give one to a friend, because they come in a set of two!
Interestingly, you can get “deals” on what can only be assumed are less “hot sellers,” like a shirt that says “History is watching us now.”
I guess people aren’t excited to remember things like “history” when they’re knee-deep in a six-pack and realizing that they only got about $300 back from the government while their boss just bought a second summer home. Oh well. That’s how Trump continues to stay flush in tanning cream—he’s a con man.