This didn’t happen overnight or suddenly, but occurred over the course of a month or so if not longer. In some ways I feel like the guy in Oliver Sacks’ book “The man who mistook his wife for a hat”.
I’ve been confused and doing stupid things, and even went as far as to take note of these incidents in my notebook I bring to my neurologist so when I see her I don’t have to remember things such as falls, medication incidents and anything else going on.
I noticed about a month or so ago that I had a hard time speaking and remembering words. My spelling has become atrocious, and I spend an inordinate amount of time correcting myself and finding substitutions. When talking to people, I find myself lost for words as if my brain has gone flat. I blamed this on being tired, or perhaps fatigued which I am on occasion, but this brain fog isn’t fog it’s thick smoke. I’ve said to my friends that I think my brain is turning to mush as I’m losing it. I even said that if a coroner performed an autopsy, he or she would find goo in there instead of a brain!
About three weeks ago, I forgot how to use a knife to cut a piece of steak. It might be that we don’t eat steak often, perhaps every few months, but seriously I didn’t know which hand to use and I sat there dumbfounded as I muddled through the process for what seemed like an eon. Eventually things clicked and I went along my merry way chopping up my steak.
A few days later I was talking to a friend of mine, not the Trumpy-sort-of friend, and I picked up my cup of tea and was ready to put it up to my ear like the phone when I swapped hands because I always use my right hand for the phone. It was as if I got my hands mixed up with what I was supposed to be doing with them. I told my friend on the other end, and we laughed about it, but in all seriousness, I could have scalded myself with that hot cup of tea.
A couple of days later after the phone thing, I made some hard boiled eggs. I filled the pot with water, put the eggs in, and proceeded to put the pot into the microwave! I caught what I was doing and put the pot on the stove. Instead of putting the burner on, I proceeded to set the timer on the microwave and had to stop myself and put the burner on instead.
When playing the piano, I forgot how to play turns www.liveabout.com/… It was weird, and I still struggle with them. In all honesty, trills, turns, mordents, and all their relations never bothered me so I find this really disconcerting.
When referring to a couple I know very well, I referred to my female friend as the husband. Gender mix ups too? It was funny at the time, but not really, and no I’m not sexist. My dad picked up on it and I felt embarrassed. The friends weren’t around (thank gawd) and my dad, brother and me there, but family being family like mine means I’ll never live this one down.
Then it happened last Tuesday night as I was playing the piano as usual. I suddenly had trouble seeing out of my left eye as if someone had taken a Sharpie marker and smudged a line across my vision. The spot was similar to what one sees after a camera flash goes off. I thought I was getting light headed and checked my right eye which was fine. This thing was only in my left eye.
The spot lasted a few minutes then I had pain in my eye and eyebrow. I thought it was due to the dry eyes and I had pulled the surface of my cornea or something, but it wasn’t that kind of pain which is more like peeling your lip except it’s at least 5 times the pain level. I put some drops in my eyes anyway, but it didn’t help other than lubing my eyes like I need to do often.
The bigger spot disappeared in a few minutes, and the pain in the eye, along with the spot coincided with a twinge in my left hand which became tight and I couldn’t play the scales I was just playing. I have some dystonia and thought it was that, but apparently that was not dystonia. The eye pain remained, and I had some pain in my temple.
I called my eye doctor the next day and got a visit on Thursday, the earliest the office could see me. He did a ton of poking and prodding along with me looking in all directions. He scanned my retina for macular damage, and checked my optic nerve. He gave me a vision test and there was a bit of vision loss in my left eye. He had me focus on his face specifically at his nose which was crystal clear, however, his right eye was blurred when looking at his face. He gave me a small grid with a white dot on it to check my vision over the following days. There is no sign now of anything amiss, and the eye is now fine. I did have to think really hard when telling him it was his right eye that was blurred though.
His conclusion is this is neurological, perhaps a TIA and he put in a call to my PCP and my neurologist. Now I wait for their follow up calls and upcoming appointments. Given the situation with the virus, I’m not keen on seeing them since my eye has improved, the headache is gone, and my hand doesn’t feel any worse. I’ll have to keep an eye on myself, however, and ensure I’m not doing stupid things like pouring tea in my ear.