We have little if any control over our lives. They way we deal with that is choosing to be out of control. Things like admitting your powerlessness over drugs, or gender transitions, following orders or going into battle with the military, doing crimes, sex, having kids, lots of things can be used to cope with control issues. There are good ways and bad ways to lose control, not that they're all good or all bad. I think a good way is to feel compassion as strongly as you can, out of control compassion. Jesus taught forgiveness, which is basically freeing people to be who God made them to be. Many religious institutions teach this, so it doesn't belong to a particular religion, but rather is what makes a religion true. You can practice compassion. Even if you don't feel it at first, you can learn to feel it intensely.