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From THE GREAT STATE OF MAINE...
Cheers and Jeers for Monday, February 2, 2004 (Super Bowl-free edition--- go to http://www.dailykos.com/story/2004/2/2/142914/2388 for the boob...I mean, scoop...on last night's hullabaloo).
JEERS to $2.4 trillion budget. Bush to slash funds for transportation, environment, agriculture, small business...do you really want me to continue? But big bucks will go to Lockheed Martin, Boeing, Northrop Grumman, General Dynamics...again, do you REALLY want me to continue?
CHEERS to Howard Dean on Meet the Press. Glides through Russert's tired `gotcha' onslaught in first segment (strange, no gay marriage darts thrown), then goes on to prove---again---that he is the most sensible candidate in the pack. And...(sigh)...a loser.
JEERS to John Kerry. Suckled more cash from the teat of special interests than any other senator---including the dead ones---in 15 years. And he don't need no stinkin' "metal solar nipple medallions" either.
JEERS to George W. Bush. "Agrees" to independent investigation of why WMD Intel was 100% wrong. The same way I "agree" to have bamboo shoots shoved up my fingernails.
CHEERS to Karl Rove. Slimming down with his new exercise video: "Sweatin' to the Inquiries."
CHEERS to UN weapons inspectors. Turns out they were thorough, thoughtful...and right. My nominees for the 2004 Nobel Peace Prize.
CHEERS (gasp!) to DNC head Terry McAuliffe. Goes on the attack on ABC's This Week, and darned if he didn't get me a little fired up about chance to beat `W' in November. Could this be the year the Democrats get their cajones back?
CHEERS to Jon Stewart. DNC should grab Thursday's WMD tirade (http://blog.deanforamerica.com/archives/003473.html ) and run it as an anti-Bush ad. Memo to Peter, Tom and Dan: your services are no longer needed...Comedy Central can take it from here.
JEERS to religion run amok. 244 dead in stampede during haj "devil-stoning ritual" in Saudi Arabia. If there's any justice in the universe, they'll find themselves in Dante's circle of Hell reserved for IDIOTS.
JEERS to "non-traditional" parent bashing. Religious wackos take verbal sledgehammer to single parents, gay parents, divorced parents, low-carb parents, tattooed parents...every chance they get, every...single...day. I have a radical idea: uh, fight back??
CHEERS to Barry Manilow. Crooner rushed to hospital with chest pains. Here's to a speedy recovery, Oh Glittered One. But now you know how we felt when `Copacabana' was on the charts.
JEERS to Colin Powell for this classic from the '02 WMD hit parade (sing along if you know the words): "My colleagues, every statement I make today is backed up by sources, solid sources. These are not assertions. What we're giving you are facts and conclusions based on solid intelligence." And wait'll you see the new tap dance routine that goes with it.
JEERS to 6 more weeks of winter. Punxutawney Phil saw his shadow this morning. Bad news for water skiers.
CHEERS to 6 more weeks of winter. Punxutawney Phil saw his shadow this morning. Great news for downhill skiers.
What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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