Come on. We've all been hoping for it. Praying for it, even. Our jobs would be that much easier if someone would come along and take 5% out of Bush from the right. Well, our prayers have been answered (literally) by the least likely of candidates (though some would say the most likely answer of prayers). Check this out.
My friend got this bizarre piece of mail (who knows how she got on the list) from someone identifying themselves only as "a member of Jesus Christ's Family and Body of Believers" that has a brilliant solution to "Establish Biblical Law, Justice, and Order!" The suggestion is so brilliant, that I had to scan it and take out a geocities account so that you could
see this document for yourself (as a .pdf file). The anonymous mailer's proposed solution:
Write in Jesus Christ for President!
I know, I know, you're probably asking yourselves the obvious question: why should we assume Jesus would take more votes from Republicans than he would from Democrats? Well, I don't have any polling data to back this up, and I know there are a good number of Democrats who do believe in Jesus, but I have a strong feeling this will swing our way.
I know, I know, you're probably wondering, how do people think Jesus can just run for President? He wasn't even born in this country! I mean...He's from the Middle East, for goodness sake! You think Christian Conservatives are going to run around electing Middle Easterners? Friends, let's not get caught up in technicalities. I think they might make an exception for this candidate.
So what do we do about it? Well, the brochure says all we have to do is mail this out to everybody we know and that no other organizing is required. Now, I don't think the people I know are very susceptible to this, but I imagine I could find some random addresses that might get a few positive responses. How about y'all?
Honestly, this is one of the funniest things I've ever seen. I'd love to take credit for it, but I couldn't have written it half this well if I'd tried. This is pure wing-nut goodness, and I pray that their plan comes to fruition, at least to the extent that it is possible, which I'd estimate at about...oh...enough to get any of the last men standing in Wisconsin into the White House. Start licking stamps, friends. The Republicans have found their Nader. As it turns out, He was with them all along.