24 hours after I established this account I acquired the power to comment. An awesome power indeed and
proof that we at dailykos (even newbies) are democrats and not aristocrats. After acquiring this power, one of the first diaries I selected to read in depth was
this one by someone named
teacherken.
A great diary. Reading teacherken inspired me to start working on a first diary of my own maybe building on this comment about God's Funeral by A.N. Wilson. I also considered writing a review of God: A Biography by Jack Miles. Both books offer nuanced and skeptical perspectives on this whole "God question" thing.
But as I started thinking about what to write I realized I was developing something dry and academic rather than an explanation of my own confused thinking about "God" and then on Saturday, I read several comments by a Maryscott O'Connor (who I gather is something of an icon around here) including this comment.
These comments reminded me of someone I once knew and prompt me to share a true story that happened oh, nearly 25 years ago.
Engage the WAY-BACK machine!
Whirring noises . . .
When I was in college, one of my classmates was this amazingly intelligent woman. She was maybe four years older than me and was a single mother. We were in the same class year at the university because she had gotten married right out of high school, and then divorced, and that little detour had slowed her down.
She was from a rural town, raised Catholic and her mother had tried to tell her "don't be smart because boys don't like smart girls." Another friend once told me she had gotten married on the same day she took her SATs but scored very, very high nonetheless.
Despite (or maybe because of) my being an innocent naive pup from a middle class suburb, I developed something of a crush on this woman.
Let's see: Extremely intelligent, funny, and attractive. What's not to like?
She was amused by this since I was far too much of a "boy" to do her much good but she did like me nonetheless. We would talk about all sorts of things like college kids do and she was an avowed atheist and bitter at the Catholic Church, apparently due to her experiences growing up.
Though young, I was smart enough not to argue with her about this.
Anyway, one day in our 4th year at college we were walking home from class and she wanted to stop at the local grocery store. Once inside she went to the deli counter and took a number.
The counter clerk looked ay my friend and asked her what she wanted, ignoring another woman standing there with a lower number. That other woman was black, with three scraggly kids hanging on her, and food stamps in her hand.
My friend exploded, threw her number on the floor, and told me we were leaving.
Outside I asked what had happened and she explained her fury at the store clerk who assumed that taking care of two white students (presumably wealthy) was more important that waiting on a poor black mother with food stamps.
I will always remember the tone in her voice when she said:
"How DARE he! - - How "DARE he!"
She then said she knew it was only a small injustice but there were so many small injustices happening so frequently, when would it ever stop? She let it go, of course, but the thought occurred to me that this woman was already a better Christian than I might ever hope to be.
So, does God exist? Well, how the hell should I know? I am not interested in arguing that question.
But!
I do know this much.
= IF = God does exist (whether a he/she/it or whatever) I do know I met its True Spirit filling the soul of a woman who professed herself an atheist while I was standing at a deli counter in a campus grocery store.