Oh, and we thought this Administration couldn't go any lower! How wrong, how very very wrong we are!
I'm sure most of you have read McJoan's front-page post about how Bush's new abstinence program is counseling no sex before marriage. So where does that leave single people, may I ask?
Oh, oh, you aren't going to believe this! Ok, I have no proof, but it just seems so obvious that all the neocons have invested heavily in this new program, and they're going to make zillions of dollars off the sexual frustrations of all Americans! See below.
From Reuters:
http://today.reuters.com/...
Yes, Kossacks, if single people can no longer have sex, how are they going to find gratification? And if someone could come up with a way to have sex WITHOUT HAVING SEX, well they could rule the world, dontcha think?
Lissen up:
When America's top sex researchers gathered recently to discuss the next decade in their field, some envisioned a future in which artificial sex partners could cater to every fantasy.
"What is very likely to be present before 2016 would be a multi-sensual experience of virtual sex," said Julia Heiman, director of the Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender and Reproduction at Indiana University, Bloomington.
"There is a possibility of developing erotic materials for yourself that would allow you to create a partner of certain dimensions and qualities, the partner saying certain things in that interaction, certain things happening in that interaction."
And who do you think has come up with the seed money for this new technology? Halliburton, perhaps? Or maybe Richard Mellon Scaife? My GOD, they've taken over the Kinsey Institute! Those bastards!
But wait! They have a name for this creepy project:
A field dubbed "teledildonics" already allows people at two remote computers to manipulate electronic devices such as a vibrator at the other end for sexual purposes.
Yeah, sure, sitting at the old computer, blogging perhaps? What is the ONLY thing that we bloggers like more than politics? Well SEX, of course! This has Rove's fingerprints all over it! Destroy the liberal blogs by enslaving all the frustrated abstinent single people with computer sex! Aaaaaah!
But wait, there's more!
"People who use it are just blown away," said Steve Rhodes, president of Sinulate Entertainment, which has sold thousands of Internet-connected sex devices over the past three years. "This is not something that just the lunatic fringe does."
"The Iraq war...was kind of a boom for our company."
Iraq War ... abstinence ... new virtual sex machines ... anyone detect a pattern here? Oh! ... and "lunatic fringe?" Code word perhaps, for LEFT WING BLOGGERS???
And they have no shame, these hypocrites. Yes, those same evil men who brought up that whole man-dog relationship thing, but this! Sex with cartoons!
Brad Abram, president of XStream3D Multimedia, said his firm's "Virtually Jenna," an online game in which the player has sex with realistic cartoon of porn star Jenna Jameson, can link hardware devices following the action to genitalia.
"None of the big publishers will probably venture in there so we could be like the Hustler or the Playboy or whatever, the Penthouse of adult gaming," the Vancouver, Canada-based Abram said. "Sex toys is a huge business."
His service, without the hardware, costs $29.95 a month, and he said several hundred thousand people have tried the online sex game to date. He expects the hardware area of such simulations to grow rapidly.
It goes on to suggest that in the not too distant future they could just hook up wires to the pleasure centers in our brains! Matrix anyone?
I am a rational woman. I do not lightly put forth a conspiracy theory. But I think the facts speak for themselves.
BEWARE, Kossaks -- the sex war is here!!!