From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE...
Sen. Joe Biden jogs our memory on Meet the Press yesterday:
"I'm going to get in trouble with my colleagues here, but the fact of the matter is from the very beginning, the Pentagon civilian leadership believed this [war] could be done much cheaper, with many fewer troops and much more quickly. Almost all of the outside experts left and right said that wasn't possible. So we started off with a significant deficit. ... On your program before the election, I said to you that they were going to call for an additional 12,000 to 20,000 troops before this election came up. The President, the secretary of defense, everybody said, "Absolutely not. We have all the troops we need." Day after the election---bang!---12,000 more troops. Everybody knows the truth. The truth is we have not armed these kids well enough. ... That's part of the reason why I believe, in addition to the war, people aren't signing up [to enlist]."
Take that, beeotch.
Cheers and Jeers starts in the Extended Copy section... [Swoosh!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!]
Cheers and Jeers for Monday, December 20, 2004... (with wide margins for the marginally impaired)
By the Numbers:
Days `til Christmas: 5
Days `til 2005: 12
Number of coffee drinkers in the United States: 167 million
Amount of coffee they drank last year: 6.3 million gallons
Amount of tea consumed last year: 2.4 million gallons
Number of cans of soda consumed by the average American last year: 574
(Source: Time magazine)
Weeks `America: The Book' has been #1 on the New York Times bestseller list: 12
Your Puppy Pic of the Day: "If you eat all your Kibbles like a good boy, Santa Dog will come down the chimney and leave you lots of squeaky toys." http://users.lavalink.com.au/theos/images/spirit%20of%20christmas.jpg "Oh will he, mama? Will he?"
CHEERS to Time magazine. They believe history will show that 2004 marked the start of the golden era of the "buh-log." (and yes, Kos gets a mention): http://www.time.com/time/personoftheyear/2004/poymoments.html. In your stocking this year: fresh pajamas!
JEERS to Time magazine. George W. Bush...ugh...is their Person of the Year. If that makes you see red, check out Newsweek's cover for the antidote: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/3032542/site/newsweek/. Ahhhh...I feel bluer already.
CHEERS to setting the record straight. Thomas Wilson---the soldier who asked Rumsfeld about the lack of armor for Humvees and other military vehicles in Iraq---says his question was not planted by a reporter: http://www.editorandpublisher.com/eandp/news/article_display.jsp?vnu_content_id=1000739870. Members of the right-wing media machine promise to debunk that myth promptly. Sometime in 2006.
CHEERS to Planet Toast. 2004 was the fourth-warmest year since weather records started being kept in 1861: http://www.usatoday.com/weather/news/2004-12-15-hot-year_x.htm. Please forgive us northerners if we don't complain too loudly--it was kinda nice being able to feel our toes in January.
JEERS to ankle tethers for Ahmed Q. Smith & Family. A new Cornell University poll shows that 44% of Americans (mostly Republicans...what a shock) say their neighbors who practice Islam should have some of their civil rights taken away...y'know, since they're probably terrorist thugs anyway: http://www.baou.com/newswire/main.php?action=recent&rid=1946. Muslim-Americans were so angry they took to the streets in mobs of, um, ones and twos.
JEERS to writer's cramp. Donald Rumsfeld finally agrees to--[sigh]--start signing condolence letters to families whose loved ones were killed in Iraq. Our condolences to Rummy's squash partners, who will be highly inconvenienced by this new drudgery on the secretary's schedule.
CHEERS to Civics 101. Canada treats gays as equals, supports medical care for all, keeps church and state separate, boasts a cleaner environment than us, has a minuscule murder rate...oh and, by the way, is now running a $9 billion surplus. http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/Canada/2004/12/16/785894-cp.html. But not all is perfect there. Celine continues to go on and on and on...
JEERS to the fox joining the other foxes who are already in the henhouse gnoshing on drumsticks and breaking eggs. Louisiana Rep. Billy Tauzin, one of the architects of the convoluted Medicare prescription drug bill, has accepted the CEO position at---take a deep breath---the Pharmaceutical Manufacturers of America: http://www.commondreams.org/news2004/1216-02.htm. Funny...my alarm clock usually wakes me up before my dreams get this nutty.
CHEERS to Democratic hawks. Mark Shields compares FDR and GWB in terms of equipping and supporting the troops in this must-read from Saturday's Post: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A9249-2004Dec17.html. And all we can think is: thank God FDR could run for a third term...and thank God our current preznit can't.
JEERS to Cokie Roberts. Speaking out of her butt on the Chris Matthews Show yesterday---without a hint of irony in her voice or on her face---she chimes in on the Bernard Kerik scandal this way: "The president's appointments so far have had very few white guys. And maybe he should stick with the other types." Maybe someone should tell her discrimination based on gender and skin color is, um, a crime. Bonus jeers for calling Fahrenheit 9/11 a "Hate America First" movie. (Your gift basket from the White House Talking Points Cubicle is on its way.)
CHEERS to sweet irony. On this date 201 years ago, the Louisiana Purchase was completed in a New Orleans ceremony with representatives of Napoleon's adnministration. The land mass encompasses parts of MT, SD, ND, IA, KS, CO, WY, LA, OK, MS and NE---red states who owe their existence to France. Sacre bleu, pardner!
CHEERS to Dorothy Geeben. The 96 year-old is running unopposed for mayor of Ocean Breeze Park, Florida: http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=533&e=3&u=/ap/20041220/ap_on_fe_st/96_ye
ar_old_mayor. Hey...you try going against a campaign that promises "An Amigo in every garage and medicinal marijuana in every freezer."
JEERS to dancin' with the one that brung ya. I have to agree with John over at Americablog: it may be time to demote our troops to a slightly smaller pedestal. After all, they voted for George W. Bush en masse for another 4 years...so they own him: http://americablog.blogspot.com/archives/2004_12_01_americablog_archive.html#110332071238967148. And sorry boys and girls...no refunds this time.
CHEERS to holiday eTailing. It's quick, it's easy, and so thoughtful. This year: porn subscriptions for everybody!
Cheers and Jeers 6-month Flashback: July 20, 2004
CHEERS to Discerning Readers. After only one week, "Michael Moore is a Big Fat Stupid White Man" drops out of the New York Times best-seller Top 10. Proof that right-wingers just don't know the meaning of the word "funny." Intentionally, I mean.
JEERS to getting fooled. Turns out Iran---not Iraq---was the big supporter of Al Qaeda terrorists, including 10 who orchestrated the attacks on 9/11. So...anyone up for another military "liberation?" I mean, since we're in the area...?
And just one more: CHEERS to holiday greetings. This is C&J's special wish for that staunch Defender-of-the-25th, Bill O'Reilly: http://www.tcnj.edu/~hofmann/humor/Misc/CampusXmas.jpg. Is that...a loofah?
Floor's open. What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Important Poll correction. The button for Kos should say "Kos and the lefty/progressive/reform blogosphere." C&J regrets the omission.