Well, okay. I needed a reason to leave here. Earlier I posted a diary that went over like a lead balloon, and I got people so upset that somehow after several years of posting here I've become a troll. I was troll-rated so much that I've lost my trusted user status. I think today was the first day I've ever even BEEN troll-rated.
I'm not going to throw a temper tantrum about it, even though I am a little upset about it, but I am going to take that as my cue to leave here, mostly because I need an out. I'm posting the diary about it because then I've said it publicly, and I'll embarrass myself if I come back and you'll all heckle me, so that will help me kick the jones. I'm sorry if this is too self-indulgent.
I am a DKOS addict, and it doesn't work for me. I spend way too much of my days here, and when I do step away, I often find myself more than a little bit dull. That's just unhealthy.
Also, suddenly life is picking up again. I have a movie I'm producing, an arts development party to plan, and a deconstruction/re-use project to work on, classes to finish, and so on. I got newspapers and magazines piled up. I got all sorts of other things to do, like, you know, go OUTSIDE.
It's been hard to leave here because DKOS has been a community to me in a time of transition when I've left all my friends 3,000 miles away. It's been my only political outlet since I have no political friends or involvement here, and I'm living with my Republican family, too. I've really enjoyed discussing things with people, learning from people, even arguing with people. This place was hugely important to me during Katrina, although I really started to get a sense of how I was taking my participation here too far when I realized just how emotionally overwhelmed I was becoming by the whole thing. Yeah, it was an emotionally overwhelming event for a lot of us and would have been no matter what, but I was compounding it by obsessing about reading every diary, and continuously commenting, sometimes way into the night etc etc. Too much. (what time is it? 1:20am??....)
And I've also been frustrated by this place. I'm frustrated by a tendency towards truthiness, and self-righteous assumption, over evidence and factiness, and that people will defend their feelings over facts to the point of shutting down all dialogue on some occasions, without backing it up with anything. I think that's dangerous and counterproductive to our common goals.
I also find the righteous anger to be often quite damaging, especially when it impedes dialogue, and when it impedes a clear examination of facts. The "Nancy Pelosi said myDD" incident nearly made my head explode, and I'm not sure why I stuck around after that, (oh wait - I'm an addict, that's right.) I also find myself more angry in life after spending lots of time here, and I don't like that either. I mean yeah, there sure is a lot to be angry about but there is also a lot of anger amongst ourselves and I've been bringing that into my life and I don't like it. I snap at people. Yech.
So, I'm going to sign off for a while. DKOS will be read-only for me from now on. I'll give myself some time to comment on this diary, but then, that's all folks.
I really adore so many of you, and I have a great deal of respect for you too. I will miss snarking around with all of you.
I'll come back when Fitz indicts somebody again, or when Bush or Cheney resigns. Gotta be here for any of that! Or, if/when we take back the House and/or Senate. Election night.
Enjoy yourselves, play nice, eat lots of pie for me, and keep the ponies coming.