Tristan Taormino, sex columnist for the Village Voice has just written a
really genius column on the whole Jack Ryan sex fiasco.
Jeri Ryan's story points to a common problem of couple sexual incompatibility, but it goes beyond that: Her husband tricked and coerced her into going places she didn't want to, both literally and figuratively. Jack Ryan still stands by his statement that her allegations aren't true, while attempting to spin the story in all sorts of ways. He's a victim of the media. He didn't break any laws. He was not unfaithful. He just wanted to have sex with his wife (I feel your pain on that point, dude). As he said on 20/20, "We've had people elected to office who have done things that are much worse than that." Yeah, Jack, but they're Democrats.
More on the flip...
One of the problems is that Mr. Ryan ran on the morality ticket, pushing traditional (read "hetero and nuclear") family values and dissing not only gay marriage, but same-sex civil unions and registries. He set himself up as the perfect family man, and ultimately looked like a hypocrite. Now he whines about being violated by the media and wanting his right to privacy, especially when it concerns his sexual relationship. Yet he supports legislation to deny other people rights based on sexual orientation (which, in his rhetoric, he mistakenly refers to as "sexual behavior"). Let's get it straight, Mr. Ryan: People criticized and abandoned you based on your sexual behavior in the context of a committed relationship. Hmmm, could the universe be trying to tell you something? Can you spell karma?
Here's how I'd like to evaluate candidates based on their sexual activities. If they're swingers, then they've confronted their own insecurities and learned to let go of possessiveness, therefore they'll be better able to make compromises when writing legislation. Is he into cross-dressing? Good, he's not oppressed by gender norms, so hopefully he'll be a better advocate for women's issues. Rumors say she likes s/m? She's probably practiced her negotiation skills a lot, and that will come in handy on the Hill. Into dominance and submission? They can see the inherent power dynamics present in society. Their love of anal sex tells me they've got a great ability to think outside the box--that could be useful in politics. And if he likes when his wife straps on a dildo and fucks him in the butt, then we've found a highly evolved man who's ahead of his time.
But when will the time come when a candidate's sex life just won't matter anymore? When the discovery of intimate information like this will be met with "You've got to dig up something more incriminating to oust this guy." Like stealing an election, lying to the American public about weapons of mass destruction, killing innocent civilians, and putting troops in harm's way without justification. Oh, wait. That guy's still running.
She's worth reading on a weekly basis, actually. And if you dig through her archives you'll find a whole boatload of trouble she got from conservatives down South after giving a sex positive speech/seminar.