The other day I had someone ask me how, as an Atheist, I seem to always do the right thing and so on. I wrote a response that I think is good, so I thought I'd share:
Doing the right thing without God: a few years ago, somebody I know mentioned how some philosopher essentially said: either God arbitrarily came up with the rules, in which case he's just a twisted control freak (who I would not respect); or, right and wrong is more fundamental, a part of the universe, like basic math, so you don't need God to fill you in on them (though perhaps he could give you a shortcut by laying them all out), you just need to discover them. I'm not willing to consider the first option of arbitrary rules, because it how could you ever know you were actually doing what God wants? Maybe the game is actually to do everything the opposite of what the Bible (or Koran or Vedas or whatever) says, and then you get rewarded? How could you know?
continued...
No, I think that ethics are natural like the second law of thermodynamics. So for me, it comes down to a few basic guidelines.
One is, the golden rule. Treat others like you want to be treated. This gets complicated because it somehow covers cracking the dude breaking into your house on the head with a baseball bat to protect your kids. But in the end, it means don't let your neighbor starve to death while you live in luxury; don't treat your kids like fashion accessories or inconveniences, instead give them every opportunity you can; don't cheat on your wife.
Next is what you said, don't fuck yourself over or you'll never be able to do good stuff for other people, unless doing so results in a greater good. This extends to your family, and somewhat to the people you work with, but even up to the National and Worldwide scale too (it is not a good idea for us to use up all our oil faster than we can find a replacement, or mess our environment up permanently). Take care of your own, not because your own are actually more important than others, but because without them you will cripple your ability to help anyone else. If you end up divorced, or in severe depression, or with kids you ignored and let get into trouble, or addicted to crack... Well, you will have much to overcome before you can do anything else worthwhile for other people. But also, the flipside is, recognize when you SHOULD make sacrifices that are wise and will achieve a greater good.
Another is the utilitarian ethic, as Spock from Star Trek said, the good of the many is greater than the good of the few or the one. This is pretty self explanatory, and maybe its just the golden rule said a different way...
Finally, always seek the truth, respect it, and act on it. So much harm is done in the world because people just stick their fingers in their ears and pretend nothings going wrong. Do the civilians in Nazi Germany really get off the hook because they didn't know about the concentration camps? Do parents really get off the hook for feeding their kids growth hormone filled meat and ADHD-inducing chemicals, letting the TV babysit, and running them on ritalin and paxil just cause they didn't find out the harmful effects? (OK, those are on totally different scales, but you see the point).
These four guidelines act in concert, and sometimes conflict with each other. These guidelines are all in play in the major religions in some way or another. But that's the other bad thing about having your moral's come to you as a preformed list: you don't have to think about it much. I think people should always have what's right or wrong on their mind, and be thinking through every action they make. Too many bad things happen because no one questioned it since it wasn't on their pre-packaged right/wrong list.