Washington, DC - August 31 (Not AP) - Following a meeting of his Cabinet to discuss federal responses to Hurricane Katrina, President Bush announced that he will make his Crawford, TX ranch - approximately 550 miles away from New Orleans - available to accommodate families made homeless in Louisiana, Mississippi, and Alabama in the wake of the hurricane.
"In this time of national tragedy, we need all Americans to reach out and help those affected, the millions left homeless by this terrible disaster," he told reporters assembled outside the West Wing of the White House. He then unexpectedly added, "We've got five bedrooms at the ranch house in Crawford, and another two in the guest house," the President said. "So I've asked Governor Blanco to identify three or four families who are stuck in the Superdome right now to be driven to Crawford."
"They can stay there for a few months, until the situation in New Orleans improves. It'll be a lot nicer for them than the Astrodome or a motel in Little Rock."
"With all of the work that we have to do to guide this country through this disaster, I won't be needing the place until Christmas," he added. "And it would be selfish of me to let it sit vacant at this time of national crisis."
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This is, of course, satire. President Bush has never made a real personal sacrifice in his life, and I don't expect that we'll see that change now.