One of my New Year's resolutions was only to post well-thought-out, well-written, weighty diaries to Kos. So my first diary of the year? Fluff. It's fear of committment, is what it is. If I actually put a lot of effort into a diary and it's hated, or worse, ignored, then I'll be crushed. If people hate this nonsense, who cares.
A few months back I was talking with one of my friends about a party game he'd plaid in which the participants talked about which minor superpower they'd want if they could have any superpower. This lead to me to think about a club for minor superheroes; ones whose powers were too limited to get into the Justice League or whatever. Instead they'd have a cruddy converted warehouse in a former industrial area of town, maybe one that isn't gentrifying because the soil is too contaminated to build on. And they'd all have to hold down day jobs...
I spent some time thinking about the membership list for such an organization. Below are a few of my suggestions. I want to know yours. Genuine whimsy gets you a "4."
Captain Hover: Can't fly, but can float about 18 inches above the ground. This may actually be a useful talent occasionally, so he'd probably be the chief.
Depresso: Makes everyone in the vacinity blue. Makes the already low suicidal. Needs therapy.
Perry Stalsis: Can poop on demand. I have no idea what this would be good for.
The twins Farto & WeeWee: No explanation necessary.
The Salivator: He knows spit.
The Appetizer: He gets near the villains and they want to break for a snack. Was a top-tier hero until the bad buys started packing lunches.
Stumblebum: Everyone in his vacinity would lose their gross motor skills. Again, perhaps useful, but s/he would be so uncoordinated that s/he couldn't take advantage of the situation and would half to work with a partner who'd demand half of the credit.
The Pensiator: Makes everyone slow down and think about life and what they're doing. Most people end up rationalizing the effect away....
The Communard: Everyone in her vicinity becomes extremely left-wing. Wears red tights, of course.