Via
TPM:
"If the GOP can't even keep a bunch of 15 year olds safe, how can they keep America safe?"
I can just imagine the speech by Bush now:
Good evening, my fellow Americans.
As you are aware, there is a despicable menace to our nation's 15 year olds. Radical Republican pedophiles will stop at nothing to take power and curtail our freedoms, all while seeking SMD--sex with minors in DC.
The Republicofascists' lust to violate our nation's 15 year olds is driven by a "culture of hypocrisy," one in which they act on pernicious desires while at the same time professing to defend the very people they seek as victims. They hate us because we are free...of the hankering for adolescent boys.
We must bring the fight to the pedophile Republicans in Congress so that we do not have to fight them here in our homes, our school playgrounds, our churches. And to those Republicans in Congress who provide comfort and aid to pedophiles in Congress, I say to you: you're either with us, or you're against us. Or you're with a teenager in the House cloakroom.
We will find you and smoke you out of your spider holes. Bring it on.
May God bless America.
Then the neocons chime in:
These Republicofascists spend precious resources pursuing SMD programs instead of paying attention to their constituents. If we take them out, we can restore democracy. The 15 year olds will greet us as liberators, dancing in the halls of the Congress.
Followed by the Tom Friedmans:
Of course, there's an imaginary world where things like this wouldn't happen, where we would focus on deeper and more serious problems in the world. But it will only stop once Republicofascist pedophiles hate other countries more than they love our children.
And then Ann Coulter kicks in:
We should round up all the rich, crusty creepy-acting Republicans that purport to protect children, castrate them, and send them into reeducation camps.
And finally Ted Stevens:
Now, listen, you don't understand. Rep. Foley sent an internet to a congressional page, and because there was no one in the tube to stop it, it got through. The internet is not a truck you can just pull over; it's a series of tubes. That's why we need to pass the Eavesdropping and Tube Enhancement Act, which will give our law enforcement officials the tools they need to catch pedophiles, regardless of what tube they go through, as well as allow telecommunications companies to offer better, pedophillia-free tubes to the American consumer.