For six years now, the GOP has controlled every branch of American government; for six years, the GOP has controlled our government. So, what with the election coming up and all, I thought it would be only fitting that we reviewed their biggest accomplishments. So without further ado.....
In only six years in power, the Republicans managed to.....
Shrink the middle class and expand the lower class,
Knock us so far into debt that my generation's grandchildren will still be paying it down,
Help turn our corporate millionaires into billionaires at the expense of their workers,
Shun the Geneva Conventions by holding prisoners without trial and then torturing them,
Shun the Constitution by tapping our phones without a warrant,
Shun the UN by invading Iraq despite the fact that the UN told us repeatedly that there were no WMDs and, therefore, no reason,
Start two wars that have turned the Middle East into a terrorist breeding ground and made us much less safe,
Refuse to sign the Kyoto Protocol and attempt to avoid a global warming disaster,
Turn us into the most hated nation in the world,
Bungle the response to Hurricane Katrina and cost the African American community countless lives,
Lose 2,600+ of our brave soldiers in an unwinnable war on a noun,
Allow us to suffer from the worst terrorist attack on American soil of all time.....
Oh yes..... and Vice President Dick Cheney, also known as Lucifer, still managed to find time to shoot his elderly friend in the face with a 12-gauge shotgun.
My, my, my..... they've been busy little beavers, haven't they? Now for the fun part! I'm sure I forgot some of the GOP's accomplishments (like the slew of congressional scandals), so feel free to list anything which may have slipped my mind.
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