Philip Jesse Silva would appreciate your vote for President in 2008. Of course, the name on the ballot will be Philip's new name, legally changed 10 years ago: Saint Michael Jesus the Archangel.
Mr. Silva would prefer, however, that you just call him "God."
"From the time I was a little boy I knew I was God and Michael the Archangel, but I didn't dare tell anyone, not even anyone in my family because I knew that the devil, Satan, was going to try to murder Me, and indeed he did try, four separate times."
Think Silva is completely batshit crazy? Well, yes, he is, according to the Sheriff who arrested him on attempted murder charges 8 months ago.
"As a matter of fact, he is crazy. Anyone in their right mind can see that," said the Sheriff who arrested Archangel.
But before you completely write off "Jesus" as a delusional nutbag, take a look at how closely many of his views align with both the declared and the assumed Republican presidential field.
Here are some of the things Mr. Archangel, er, God, would do as your President (italics are mine):
1.) I will outlaw by Executive Order all abortion in America because it has committed genocide against 40 to 50 million innocent helpless babies in America alone which cannot be tolerated any longer in a country that, according to a Supreme Court decision, is officially Christian.
Clearly, God stole this viewpoint from John McCain.
3.) I will outlaw queer marriage by Executive Order because a Christian country cannot and should not tolerate what My Holy Word, the Bible, calls an "abomination..."
Well, he wrote the book; he should know.
5.) End illegal immigration and even most legal immigration for if all countries are prosperous and free, what need will there be for anyone to immigrate? Instead people will "bloom where they're planted."
In a single 4-year term, all countries on the planet will be prosperous and free. He must be God!
8.) I will choose a strong female Conservative Republican as My running mate. My list of potential candidates for the Office of Vice President consists of Ann Coulter, the tough conservative author and Human Events writer, Congresswoman Marilyn Musgrave of the Pro-Life Alliance, Secretary of Labor Linda Chavez, and conservative commentator Michelle Malkin.
Sounded like a Democrat -- until we got to that Coulter part.
9.) I will sign an Executive Order mandating the recitation of the Pledge of Allegiance to the American Flag at the beginning of every school day in the public schools.
"One nation, under me..."
10.) I will order an end to the teaching of the monkey-business theory of macro-evolution in the public schools.
Can we still teach it in private schools?
13.) As soon as possible after taking office, I will commence buying for the United Domains Of Heaven other pacified countries' bombs, mines, large ammunition, rockets, tanks, armored vehicles, artillery and other metal weapons of war that have become obsolete or unnecessary to melt them down and to use the metal to cast Heavenly coins to promote the peace and building Heaven on Earth.
Um...what?
18.) I will use the Oval Office as a true right-wing Christian and proud of it "bully pulpit" and will refuse to be cowed by the traitorous liberals and other Satan-worshiping leftists preaching their false doctrine of "separation of church and state," which cannot be found anywhere in the American Constitution although our right to freedom of religion, speech and press can!
God would never write a run-on sentence that way.
22.) I will confiscate the UN building with American troops, send all the socialist ambassadors there home, and turn it into the Headquarters of the United Domains Of Heaven On Earth.
Idea stolen from Bush.
25.)Socialism, Communism (International Socialism), Nazism (National Socialism), Fascism, and atheism and other anti-God anti-philosophies and organizations such as the Communazi ACLU (which I say might as well stand for Anti-Christian Lawyers' Union) will be outlawed.
I'm guessing the HRC doesn't stand much of a chance either.
28.) I will take a zero-tolerance stance towards murder, ordering that everyone convicted of murder in any degree be executed.
Zero-tolerance for murder leads to execution?
29.) Since belief in Islam and the Koran is inconsistent with American freedom of religion because Islam believes in freedom of religion only for Muslims, and since they teach that Christians and Jews are "infidels" or pagans and since Americans have no way of knowing which Muslims are going to be or are terrorists and which are not, and since it is very, very likely that "American" Muslims are supporting terrorism quietly through contributions to Muslim "charities" which are really terrorist fronts, and since Islam teaches the supremacy of Islam and the Muslim, all "American" Muslims will be given one month after I am elected to renounce their belief in their false, oppressive, and dangerous religion, Islam.
That, or you may be tasered.
32.) I will make all gun laws in America uniform from state to state with the state most generous towards and supportive of the 2nd Amendment as the state all other states' gun laws will be conformed to.
Taser guns included.
Read the rest at the link up top...and then ask yourself, how far from "mainstream Republican" is this nutjob?