On Sunday, New Gingrich started spewing nonsense about a "wider war" (a war that, according to him includes not only Iraq but Iran and North Korea.. He also complained about how unfair restricting one form of speech (money) while the government had the right, nay, the duty to stamp down the terrorist internets. Meanwhile his fellow ideologue , Bill Kristol, was on The Daily Show defending the "surge" because like the German generals in the spring of 1918, he is sure that one more push will do.
These statements force me to ask the following questions:
Are the neocons Evil?
Or are they just a bunch of misguided nerds who see Baghdad as a super fun dungeon crawl?
Do they really believe that dropping bombs is like flinging fireballs?
And why am I abusing your sensibilities, oh gentle reader, with so many D&D references?
The answer, one that has eluded so many smart people through the last four or five years is that the neocons are not just evil, they are a special kind of evil. What kind of evil is that? Lawful Evil!
Wikipedia defines Lawful Evil as:
Lawful Evil
Lawful evil is the methodical, intentional, and frequently successful devotion to a cruel organized system.
Lawful evil characters methodically take what they want within the limits of their personal code of conduct (which are frequently their laws, as this alignment tends to only work for people in positions of power) without regard for whom it hurts. They care about tradition, loyalty, and order but not about freedom, dignity, or life. They play by the rules, but do so without mercy or compassion. They are comfortable in a hierarchy and would like to rule, but are willing to serve. They loath to break promises, and are therefore very cautious about giving their word unless a bargain is clearly in their favour.
This reluctance comes partly from their nature and partly because they depend on order to protect themselves from those who oppose them on moral grounds. Some lawful evil villains have particular taboos, such as not killing in cold blood (but having underlings do it) or not letting children come to harm (if it can be helped). They feel these personal morals put them above unprincipled villains but also know that they are protected by the orderly, systematic structure they exist in.
Ok, now that we have a definition, lets break down by the numbers.
1. Lawful evil is the methodical, intentional, and frequently successful devotion to a cruel organized system.
Well we know that the neocons are devoted tp a cruel and organized system know as the imperial wing of the Republican party. No matter how low Cheney/Bush ratings go or how many times somebody exposes their harebrained ideas about a indestructible American hegemony, they never deviate from their stance. Not even defeat at the polls is enough to deter them. I guess is time to bring the +5 Holy Avenger into play.
2. Lawful evil characters methodically take what they want within the limits of their personal code of conduct (which are frequently their laws, as this alignment tends to only work for people in positions of power) without regard for whom it hurts.
War profiteering, check.
Striping hundreds of people of their basic human rights, check.
Using the Constitution as toilet paper, check.
Invading a foreign nation under false pretenses so as to inflate your own stock options, check.
3. They care about tradition, loyalty, and order but not about freedom, dignity, or life. They play by the rules, but do so without mercy or compassion.
Burning the flag, gay marriage and abortion are big taboos. Free speech, incarceration without torture and the deaths of hundreds of thousands, not so much. Of course when you write your own rules and believe in an Unitary Executive, the rules don’t really matter that much, unless they can be used against them.
4. They are comfortable in a hierarchy and would like to rule, but are willing to serve.
Bush is the front man, but from Cheney on down, all of the other neocons prefer to rule from the shadows. From deep within the bowels of the bureaucracy, they strike out and then scurry back when things don’t go their way. And because they are sued to operating from the shadows, they have no problems blaming everybody but themselves when things go south. Just ask Tom Friedman. Its not his fault that the Iraqis are so stupid that they prefer to kill each other rather than accept the glory that is western-style democracy.
5. They loath to break promises, and are therefore very cautious about giving their word unless a bargain is clearly in their favor. This reluctance comes partly from their nature and partly because they depend on order to protect themselves from those who oppose them on moral grounds.
Dick Cheney did not swear an oath when he was interviewed by the 9/11 commission. And a Republican Congress didn't bother with pesky oaths when Big Oil come to town in 2005. You don’t want to tell a lie that would then get you indicted because there is a law that says it is illegal to lie to Congress, under oath.
6. Some lawful evil villains have particular taboos, such as not killing in cold blood (but having underlings do it) or not letting children come to harm (if it can be helped). They feel these personal morals put them above unprincipled villains but also know that they are protected by the orderly, systematic structure they exist in.
Examples of this type of behavior are well documented. Jeanne Kirkpatrick support for fascist government in South America. Using contractors or foreign government to torture suspects. Instigating torture and murder inside American facilities and then passing the buck to a few "bad apples".
So what does it all mean? It means that neocons are experts at exploiting the system. They are willing to play by the rules, as long as they are the ones making them. They put order about freedom and don’t care about anyone or anything. They may live in a fantasy world of barbarians (Islamofacist and Liberals), trolls (Ahmadinejad, Chavez, Kim Jong Il) and demons (al-Qaeda and China), but it is us, in the real world that pay the price for their brand of evil.
And because I am a self-pimping whore, here is a your pootie pic of the night!