I have no more Faith. I am spent. I am done. I surrender.
I feel as if we have been abandoned by whatever kind and loving entity that I had always - until recently - trusted in. I am starting to think that all that I have believed my whole life - that bad guys finish last, that good will triumph over evil, karma - all of that - was just bullshit.
Evil DOES triumph. Good may or may not be rewarded in the afterlife, but it don't mean shit here. It's all about "me", what's in it for "me"? How mean can I be to my neighbor? Someone needs help? Screw them! I got mine - it's up to them to get theirs. If they can't, well they're just lazy and don't deserve it. I'm going to drive my Hummer - screw the environment. Who cares about trees? Damn commie tree hugging lib'ruls, that's who. Pussies. Who wants to be one of THOSE?
(Crossposted at Street Prophets)
I am surrounded by negativity. (I should explain - I live in a small town in Florida.) I am finding myself less and less able to keep my head up. With all the evil that is being perpetrated by the Folks In Charge - WHEN WILL THE OPPOSITION BEGIN TO OPPOSE?
At what point does evil need to be confronted? How far will you let it go? Where is the line that you call "too much"? Preemptive war based on lies? Oh - okay. Torture? Oh, sure - that's fine. People rounded up without due process - or even being charged with a crime and held incommunicado for YEARS? Well, you know...yeah, that's bad, but you know - I guess it's okay, as long as it's THEM being rounded up. Warrentless wiretapping, sneak and peek searches on American citizens? Well - since it's happening to US, I guess we should - you know - investigate.
Huh?
I seriously can't hear anymore. I don't want to see or read anymore lies, anymore scandals, anymore evil. I'll be over here in the corner with my fingers in my ears contemplating the Deeper Meaning of American Idol and What Will Angelina and Brad Do Next. Come get me when the hoards take to the streets. I have my pitchfork and torch right here - ready. Until then, I'm cocooning.
Can you give me hope? Do you still have Faith? Why? How? Help me to see what you see, help me renew my faith.
One more thing:
In Germany, the Nazis first came for the communists,
and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a communist.
Then they came for the Jews,
and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Jew.
Then they came for the trade unionists,
and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a trade unionist.
Then they came for the Catholics,
but I didn't speak up because I was a Protestant.
Then they came for me,
and by that time there was no one left to speak for me.
by Reverend Martin Niemoeller
Update [2006-3-23 17:49:2 by Nonie3234]:
Thank you - everyone - for your warmth, support and some really great ideas!
I DO think I need to unplug - perhaps not take any news in for a little while.
Not forever, just until I get my bearings back.
I also like the idea of focusing on small things.
What I can do today, right here that would add some good to the world.
Thanks so much for listening!