Should Democrats abandon the fight to legalize gay marriage in order to get elected? Should we make compromises regarding abortion rights so that people will think we're moral? I think we'd all agree that the answer is "no!"
However, some people go too far in the other direction. They believe that every Democratic politician should voice strong approval of gay marriage and be loudly pro-choice, that otherwise they aren't "Standing Up" for what they believe in.
I disagree, not because people should be cowardly and afraid to voice their opinion, but because we simply have finite resources. It comes down to what I'll call a values hierarchy.
Each person has their own hierarchy of values. Just to get it out there, I care more about global warming, the Iraq war, extreme poverty here and abroad, and the injustice of our prison system, than I do about gay marriage. However, I personally care more about gay marriage than I do about gun control ("when in the course of human events...") That's my personal hierarchy, and it is changeable.
Likewise, the Democratic party has a hierarchy of values. It's hard to say exactly what that is, because as a conglomerate of many different people, each with her own voice, it can be hard to make out which ones are at the top. But, perhaps we could say Iraq, energy, and lobby/corruption/election reform are near the top. Again, this is quite changeable.
Here's why this concept is important. We have finite resources. Resources include our money and our time. Even if everyone on dailykos spent 10 hours a week doing something active for the cause, it still adds up to a finite amount of time. Even if we each contribute 5% of our salary, it's still a finite amount of money. The way we use these two resources (time and money) is to try and get a chance to explain our views to the voters and maybe convince them that our ideas are better than those of our opponents.
Our objective as a party is to help change things for the better. To do that, of course we need to get elected, and in order to get elected, we must convince people that our ideas are indeed better. Thus, convincing Americans that our ideas are better becomes a large part of our goal.
The point is that changing a person's mind requires access and time. Anyone who has canvassed a neighborhood or talked to their friends about politics knows that each issue takes some time to sort out. The further apart two people start out on a given issue, the longer it will take for them to come to a consensus on it.
And so, the fact that we have finite resources means that we will not be able to change everyone's mind on every issue. That is just a fact.
The issues that we focus on the most should reflect our values hierarchy. I personally would rather spend my energy convincing people to take a look at the global poverty situation than to accept gay marriage. Now that's not to say that I wouldn't stand my ground in a gay marriage dispute. I believe strongly in equal rights, and I would say so. The difference is that I would bring up other issues before I brought up that one. I expect the same from politicians: say what you believe, but focus on the issues you care most about.
And I think that this is the crucial point. Just because we value some things more than others, it does not imply that we should abandon the lesser, or be wishy washy, cowardly, or fake. We should always work to promote all of our values. However, each person and each faction of each party must work the hardest to promote the values that are most important to them.
If a politician is scared to stand up for gay rights, then they deserve our disdain. However, if they don't bring it up very often, that is not necessarily an abandonment of the issue. It may simply reflect their personal values. If you don't like it, work as hard as you can to get someone else elected in their place. That is your duty as someone who cares! But don't expect everyone else to be on board with you, because others may care about issues in different proportions than you do.
The days of the weak-kneed, wishy-washy, "tell me what you want me to say and I'll say it" Democrats are coming to an end. That does not mean that Democrats will begin standing up equally for all issues in the progressive platform. They will and they should expend their resources in a way that matches the values of their membership.