Ruilers Newswire - August 7, 2007
Whitehouse press secretary Tony Snow today answered questions
about a newly revealed terrorism prevention program. Documents
leaked to the New York Times reveal Department of Homeland
Security contracts with Haliburtan subsidiary DPG Security
Inc. to develop an 'Integrated Surveillance Threat Response
System' (ISTR).
The system appears to consist of millions of small devices
that can gather data, funnel it back to a central location
for processing, and upon identification of a threat, detonate
a focused explosive charge that can neutralize the threat.
More after the jump...
This technology seems to leverage previously developed
military systems. 'Smart mines' already have the capability
to be deactivated or detonated via remote control, and small
surveillance systems that communicate over great distances
are nothing new. This system, however, appears to combine
the two technologies and use them in an innovative way.
Rather than being deployed in fixed locations that terrorist
suspects might never encounter, these devices will be deployed
directly on human targets. They can provide full 24 hour,
seven day a week intelligence gathering for each individual
terrorist suspect. Furthermore, the 'threat response' part of
the system provides an immediate and decisive countermeasure
when subversive activities are discovered.
The current form factor for the ISTR system is a small,
lightweight collar intended to fit loosely around the
wearers neck. It includes a locking clasp that completes a
'dead man' circuit. removal of the collar will detonate the
threat response charge.
Critics point out that the intrusive nature of this device
negates its usefulness as a surveillance tool, with questions
like, 'how will you get the terrorists to wear the blasted
thing?'
The answer appears to be widespread deployment among the
general population. "Terrorist embed themselves among the
civilian population", stated Tony Snow, "and it is among that
population that we must search for them. Patriotic Americans
have nothing to fear from their government. If you are not
an enemy of America, then you should have nothing to hide.
Really, I expect it is only the terrorists and their enablers
that will resist this important effort in the War on Terror."
Congress is already debating a bill that would make ISTR
deployment a mandatory condition of US citizenship. Several
prominent Republican Senators even wore harmless mock-ups of
the ISTR collar to show their solidarity and support for the
plan. Senator Rick Santorum (R-PA) even painted his collar in
patriotic red, white, and blue, calling it a 'freedom collar'.
Senate majority leader Bill Frist (R-TN) had the following to
say: "The price of freedom is eternal vigilance, and really,
nothing is more vigilant than the ISTR system. When terrorists
realize the extents to which we are willing to go to protect
our citizens, I expect they will think twice before stepping
onto our soil."
Senator Russ Fiengold (D-WI) expressed outrage at the plan,
describing it as a "descent into police state madness."
Frist responded by calling Fiengold a "chicken-little ninny"
and claimed "we had enough of your alarmist claptrap with
the Patriot Act and that NSA wiretapping mess. You insult the
President every time you suggest he might misuse his power."
He then ceremonially donned his own ISTR collar.
* * * * * *
Sometimes the only difference between reality and parody is
a matter of degree.