Reprinted from The Satirical Political Report http://satiricalpolitical.com
The Scooter Libby perjury trial took a dramatic turn today, when it was revealed that the Bush Administration’s claim that Iraq tried to purchase yellow cake uranium from Africa, was based entirely on the old Nigerian Spam Scam.
To make things worse, the spam email in question offered uranium from the African country of Niger, not Nigeria, thus making it a scam spam scam.
Evidence offered by Prosecutor Fitzgerald established that Ambassador Joe Wilson, during his trip to Africa, discovered an e-mail message from DeWayne Abbadabbadoo, the purported son of a Nigerian diplomat, to Saddam Hussein.
The email claimed that Dewayne’s father had owned a uranium mine in Niger, and had been murdered by political enemies. DeWayne pleaded that he was desperate to transport 800 tons of yellow cake out of the country, so that it could be safely secured for future science fair projects in African elementary schools.
The email concludes by "soliciting for your Mr. Saddam’s assistance to provide your bank account and social security numbers, so that the yellow cake could be deposited in your account, whereupon you will promptly receive 25% of the uranium."
The "email string" also contains a reply from Saddam: "I might be delusional about the great love and affection that the Iraqi people have for me and my moronic sons, but I can smell your bullshit from a continent away."
However, a note scrawled by the Vice President on his copy of these emails states: "Abbadabbadoo message looks legit/Saddam reply fishy."
Fitzgerald closed his case by introducing an even more explosive document, an email from Cheney to Libby, which finally explains the Administration’s strange obsession with showing that Joe Wilson was sent to Niger by his wife, Valerie Plame:
"We may have started a senseless war under false pretenses ... but at least we’re not pussywhipped!"