Not knowing what to do with my excess energy, and links, this morning, I got up to no good.
[note: this diary has nothing at all to do with C&J; Baldwiny's late edition will be up sometime this afternoon/evening. now!!!]
Here's an example:
Lonely man brought donkey to hotel room, court told
well, there's a jolly story, I thought, reading my email yesterday. so away I went, via the magic of teh intertubes, et voila!
A man who was found dressed in latex and handcuffs brought a donkey to his room in a Galway city centre hotel, because he was advised "to get out and meet people," the local court heard last week.
Thomas Aloysius McCarney with an address in south Galway was charged with cruelty to animals, lewd and obscene behaviour, and with being a danger to himself when he appeared before the court on Friday. He was also charged with damage to a mini-bar in the room, but this charge was later dropped when the defendant said that it was the donkey who caused that damage.
Solicitor for the accused Ms Sharon Fitzhenry said that her client had been through a difficult time lately and that his wife had left him and that his life had become increasingly lonely.
"Mr McCarney has been attending counselling at which he was told that he would be advised to get out and meet people and do interesting things. It was this advice that saw him book into the city centre hotel with a donkey," she said. She added that Mr McCarney also suffered from a fixation with the Shrek movies and could constantly be heard at work talking to himself saying things like "Isn’t that right, Donkey?"
Supt John McBrearty told the court that Mr McCarney who had signed in as " Mr Shrek" had told hotel staff that the donkey was a family pet and that this was believed by the hotel receptionist who the supt said was "young and hadn’t great English."
Receptionist Irina Legova said that Mr McCarney had told her that the donkey was a breed of "super rabbit" which he was bringing to a pet fair in the city. The court was told that the donkey went berserk in the middle of the night and ran amok in the hotel corridor, forcing hotel staff to call the gardai.
McCarney was found in the room wearing a latex suit and handcuffs, the key to which the donkey is believed to have swallowed. He was removed to Mill St station after which it is said he was the subject of much mirth among the lads next door in The Galway Arms.
He was fined €2,000 for bringing the donkey to the room under the Unlawful Accommodation of Donkeys Act 1837. Other charges were dropped due to lack of evidence.
Now, I'd like to recommend a specialist for him to consult...
colorful filler:
here's a Hasselhoffian Recursion for you mathphiles out there.
on an unrelated note, I'd heard of hailing taxis, but this goes a bit too far, don't you think?
more color:
the lighter side of libation dep't.:
Have you ever gotten up off the couch to get a beer for the umpteenth time and thought, "What if instead of ME going to get the BEER, the BEER came to ME???" Well, that was how I first conceived of the beer launching fridge. About 3 months and several hundred dollars later I have a fully automated, remote controlled, catapulting, man-pit approved, beer launching mini-fridge. It holds 10 beers in its magazine with 14 more in reserve to store a full case. It is controlled by a keyless entry system. Pressing unlock will start the catapult rotating and when it is aiming at your target, pressing unlock again will stop it. Then the lock button can be pressed to launch a beer in the selected direction.
Finally, there's this:
When Edgar Bronfman Jr gained ownership of Universal Studios he got into some odd marketing campaign practices.
One of which is this rare, employee orientation video, that enlightened people about how things were going to change under new management.
It was comissioned to be written and directed by Matt Stone and Trey Parker, and it was, and Jr. didn't like it, so they scrapped it. Video includes appearances by Steven Spielberg, Demi Moore, Tracy Lords, James Cameron, Michael J. Fox, and Sylvester Stallone.
it runs 13:44, but is amusing...and different.
and, as with all good humor pieces, I'll end this with a punchline.
thanks.