Senator Larry Craig could have come up with a better excuse to explain away his roaming hand and foot in a airport toilet stall. But being accused as a homosexual or Gay shouldn't be the issue. The issue is hypocrisy.
Republicans put new spin on Homophobia
By RAY HANANIA
Can’t homosexuals come up with a better signal than to twist your leg and try to stick it under the stall next to you to kick the foot of another "stall mate" in order to make a pass?
Idaho Republican Senator Larry Craig insists he wasn’t trying to make a pass at the guy in the "next stall" when his foot slid under the stall wall and touched the foot of the other guy.
That "other guy" turned out to be an undercover cop investigating sexual predators working airport bathrooms who then arrested the Republican Senator.
Did I mentioned that Craig is a REPUBLICAN?
Craig insists he is not Gay. Who said he is? People can be "AC/DC," I guess, and not Gay.
And apparently, you can be a Republican who doesn’t stand for the conservative values that Republicans hypocritically tout so often in holy-than-thou sermons in the U.S. Congress.
What a bunch of hypocrites? How many Republicans have been nailed for doing all the things they insist they are against because they are Republicans.
Congressman Mark Foley, the Florida Republican, was preying on young male congressional pages for years. Everyone in Congress either knew or suspected it. Outgoing House Speaker Dennis Hastert probably knew about it, and did nothing.
Good riddance Hastert. You phony hypocrite. You sat back and said nothing when you knew about Foley. When was the last time you served this country in the military on a frontline fighting to defend this country? At a fundraiser attended by thousands of military families and servicemen kicking in their paltry salaries into your campaign war chest?
Don’t let the toilet stall door hit your butt on the way out.
You owe the American people, and especially the people of Illinois whom you have embarrassed, an apology.
The fact that Craig may or may not be homosexual, or just another Republican victimized by the excesses of the left-leaning liberal media establishment than chalk-board screeching columnist Ann Coulter empties her endless bile upon in her writings, doesn’t bother me.
Who cares what a Republican’s lifestyle is or isn’t?
Did I mention Craig is a member of the National Rifle Association? I wonder if they have a position on homosexuals. No pun intended!
If Craig wants to meet people in a toilet, that’s his business. I don’t care. But don’t pretend you are holier-than-thou! Better than everyone else. Closer to God when we know that God dislikes hypocrites, too.
What really bothers me is that Craig, Foley and Hastert are big fat hypocrites. Oh how they stand up and sermonize about the evils of society. How they rail against foreigners and all the evils immigrants who can’t speak English will bring in to America.
They hold themselves up as the moral majority – which they are not – and offer moral judgments about everyone else but themselves.
Their leader, President George W. Bush, is a bald-faced liar who dodged active duty service to hide out in the reserves during the Vietnam War, and then made up lies in order to invade Iraq to avenge an insult hurled at his father by Saddam Hussein.
Hypocrisy. It is the worst sin.
And to listen to Republican Senator Craig wiggle his way out from under charges that he solicited sex from a male stranger in an airport bathroom is hilarious.
There’s always a chance that Craig was merely trying to edge his foot over to the other stall because he’s a cheap Republican. He saw a quarter on the tile floor and was trying to scrape it back with his foot into his stall from under the next stall.
That’s what members of Congress do best, don’t they? Take money from everyone else? Of course, the other thing members of Congress do is to keep the ugly secrets of the misconduct by their colleagues a secret.
They seem to be very good at that.
I was in a similar situation of sorts once.
I was minding my own business in an airport bathroom when the guy in the next stall started to talk.
"How you doing?" He asked.
I didn’t want to be impolite. After all, I am a Democrat. I say hello back to strangers when strangers say hello to me.
"I’m doing fine, pal. How about you?" I replied.
"So where you going?" the stranger asked.
"I’m going back home. I just got back from a comedy tour in Israel. It was a blast. We did 10 shows and the Arabs and the Israelis loved the shows. They laughed. They are so opposite the extremists in this country. In fact, Arabs and Jews in America are more extreme than Arabs and Jews in Israel and Palestine." I always get carried away with me liberal, leftwing agenda rhetoric. "You know, we are going back to Israel to perform comedy after Thanksgiving ..."
Next thing I hear the guy say angrily, "Hey Tom. Can I call you back? There’s a moron in the stall next to me talking like a lunatic and I can’t hear what you’re saying."
Hey. At least I’m not a cop arresting you for using a cell phone in a public toliet.
Now, if Craig had just come up with that story as his excuse, and not pled guilty to sexual impropriety charges, maybe I might have believed him when he wasn’t tapping the other guy’s foot as a signal to engage in homosexual conduct at that Minneapolis airport public toilet.
He was just trying to get him to shut up. Politely, of course.
(Ray Hanania is an award winning columnist and senior political writer for the Southwest News-Herald, www.SWNewsHerald.com. He can be reached at rayhanania@comcast.net)