In a stunning upset the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics (U.S.S.R) has been declared the winner of the cold war.
The surprise victory by an adversary some already considered defeated, came with the passage of S.1927, A bill to amend the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act of 1978 to provide additional procedures for authorizing certain acquisitions of foreign intelligence information and for other purposes.
Few expected the surprise move by the socialists which left the U.S, formerly the world champion of democracy and citizen's rights, staggering around the mat in a state of fear swinging wildly at anything even, supporters trying to help.
The victorious blow was an uppercut to the civil liberties delivered by the U.S. itself. The uppercut came after a series of body blows, once again issued by the U.S. itself on its own people after it was disoriented by a showy but ineffectual jab.
Officials stopped the fight and called the victory for the U.S.S.R. which appeared to be still be lying face down on the mat.
An official, who requested anonimity, explained the controversial decision,
Look it really looked like the U.S. was going to win the cold war. The U.S. entered the new century the lone superpower with a robust economy admired by much of the world.
With victory in the cold war almost certain, what happened?
After the 2000 election however, the U.S. began to behave erratically. The attacks of September 11th aggravated certain paranoid fantasies within the administration. A series of poor decisions by the administration and backed by the congress slowed the economy to a standstill and squandered the goodwill of former supporters.
Fast forward to 2007.
We were concerned with the U.S.'s behavior, especially after victory in the cold war seemed so close so we looked into it and what we found was astounding. The U.S. is the former U.S.S.R.
The official continued,
Look, the U.S. was at one point defined by its constitution but we found that was no longer true. U.S. citizens no longer enjoy the rights guaranteed by its constitution, they no longer have the right to habeas corpus, they no longer have the right to confront their accusers in a court of law. U.S. citizens can be detained without charge, secretly for an indefinite period, without legal counsel. Even when provided legal counsel, that counsel can be denied access to secret evidence. The final straw was S. 1927 which removed any barriers to spying on citizens without a warrant.
Now what defines the U.S.?
The U.S. Constitution is now a meaningless piece of paper.
As of S.1927 a U.S. citizen can have their communications monitored by secret police without a warrant or, even probable cause. If the president decides, that citizen can be declared an unlawful combatant and disappear, they can be tried in a secret court without legal counsel, access to evidence, or even the right to confront their accusers. That is if they are lucky, they can also be transported to a foreign country and tortured, nobody has to be informed.
The decision isn't so controversial,
We had to call it for the U.S.S.R. because when we looked into it, the U.S. is the former Soviet Union, there is no difference. The U.S. is a single party state with no guarantees of citizens rights, it is the U.S.S.R!
A single party state?
Well, an opposition party that opposes nothing isn't really a second party now is it?
Surely, that is a bit over dramatic, surely things aren't as bad as they were in the Soviet Union?
They aren't? What is to stop them from becoming that way? Were are the checks and balances on the accumulation of unilimited power? Do you believe president bush when he promises not to misuse that power? Well, then I will tell you that Stalin never killed anyone who wasn't an enemy of the state the downside was that disagreeing with Stalin made you any enemy of the state. Stalin killed 14 million people protecting the homeland. Do you think that a Congress that cannot stand up to a president with a 27% approval rating is going to stand up for citizens rights when it gets tough. Do you think a Supreme Court that is being filled with rubber stamped conservatives is going to even hear your case?
Now you know why when bush looked into Putin's eyes, he saw a man he could do business with.