All last week Mika Brzezinski, Joe Scarborough, Tim Russert, Pat Buchanan, Andrea Mitchell, Chuck Todd and a host of other from the punditoria sat around in different coffee shops in Iowa, New Hampshire, South Carolina or some other state talking about the the upcoming caucuses and primaries.
One would have hoped (oh I am so deluded) that they would be talking about some of the issues....as I said, one would have hoped
Nope..... it is the what if game, made even more theatrical by the 'unexpected' Hillary win in NH. It is the horse race. It is the 9th at Santa Anita, the 6th at Belmont, the daily double from Hialeah, the run for the roses. You know what, it isn't a horse race -- it is really theatre of the absurd.
What if all the waitresses in Nevada switch parties and vote for Obama?
What if the Italians who married Belgians vote for Hillary?
What if McCain gets a split vote with the cow farmers and bank tellers?
What if Mitt's hair is transmitting signals on how to vote?
What if Hillary comes in dead last?
What if Hillary decides to kiss Mike Huckabee?
What if Judy Giuliani needs to have her dog walked?
What if Obama beats Edwards, but loses to Hillary in South Carolina but gets 38% of the vote in Nevada taking him to Florida where Romney can beat Huckabee, who despite his floating cross has the 'mo to make Fred Thompson drop the ball in Michigan causing Rudy to be victorious on Super Tuesday?
What if i vomit on the Diebold machine? Does it get replaced? or does it continue to miscount votes?
For over two weeks we have been privy to the inner workings of the minds of What-If-Then geniuses. Have they even discussed one issue in any sort of depth, just ONE! What if they mention an issue, would that actually make voters smarter and better informed? Is that bad? -- I guess it is if you are Buchanan and Tweety and Scarborough -- as it would end their entire purpose for being callers in the horse race theatre than this election has become.
I like horse racing -- except i like at Belmont. I don't need to keep hearing the four networks of the apocalypse keep calling it as they come down the stretch at the Meadowlands.
And we wonder why the country is falling apart?