Oh, RedState, woe is you. I know reaching out and depending on the will of others for your welfare is hard to do. But I have to say, you've done a great job at sounding really, really pathetic.
More on the flip ...
I felt priveledged to hear your call:
Dear RedState Reader:
I have bad news.
Time is running out. We need to finish raising $10,000.00 by this coming Sunday.
Can you go here to help. We need the money ASAP.
Not even a question of "will you?", it's not even a ... question. I won't link any of the links. It's too painful.
Now some good news: Reader generosity has kept the project moving forward. Assuming we meet our goal this week, we will be able to launch our fully armed and operational RedState in the next month.
Honest, we'll use the money to buy food for our programmers! We won't blow it on booze and smokes like we did last time!
The new RedState will bring awesome tools online for the right to fight.
That is, once you finish paying for our Party! And we're just getting started ...
In February, we will be launching RedState v.3.0 – a complete website overhaul that will be our own specially-created platform designed to give us all the capabilities, power and independence to serve you, our readers with everything you want and deserve.
You mean, if I want a refund, I deserve one? Cool! but will I actually get one? Probably ... not.
Upgrades and improvements like these will immeasurably enhance the RedState.com experience for you and other readers – and help to attract new readers and thereby extend our influence during this crucial election season.
We're already using what little influence we have left to keep from having to actually pay for rack space and power, so the cash would really help!
And, if at all possible, please make your donation immediately by clicking here. We’re already financially committed to this upgrade, and the bills for it are already coming due.
That sounds strangely familiar, committing resources to something you don't understand, and then balking at paying for it. It's reminiscent of invading other countries for oil, sort of, but perhaps on a smaller scale.
I’ll be blunt:
Oh, please do. This grovelling is so untidy.
I hate asking you for money. But I hate even more to imagine what America will be like if someone like Hillary Clinton or Barack Hussein Obama wins the presidency in November.
Yeah! She's obviously such a woman. And his middle name is Hussein, and you know what that means! Wink, wink!
RedState can help prevent that nightmare from coming true – but only if we’re offering the best possible web experience to the widest possible audience.
So don't worry that the Republican candidates all suck equally, we want new toys for our sandbox! So just send us money!
It really makes me wonder how Kos ever got this place off the ground.