Subject: George W Bush Presidential Library
Dear Fellow Constituent:
The George W Bush Presidential Library is now in the planning stages and accepting donations.
The Library will include:
The Hurricane Katrina Room, which is still under construction.
The Alberto Gonzales Room, where you won't be able to remember anything.
The Texas Air National Guard Room, where you don't even have to show up.
The Walter Reed Hospital Room, where they don't let you in.
The Guantanamo Bay Room, where they don't let you out.
The Weapons of Mass Destruction Room, which no one has been able to find.
The National Debt Room, which is huge and has no ceiling.
The Tax Cut Room, with entry only to the wealthy.
The Economy Room, which is in the toilet.
The Iraq War Room. (After you complete your first visit, they make you to go back for a second, third, fourth, and sometimes fifth visit.
Abu Ghraib room where you leave with a complimentary set of nipple electrodes.
The Dick Cheney Room, in the famous undisclosed location, complete with shotgun gallery.
The Environmental Conservation Room, still empty.
The Supreme Gift Shop, where you can buy an election.
The Airport Men's Room, where you can meet some of your favorite Senators.
The Decider Room, complete with dart board, magic 8-ball, Ouija board, dice, coins, and straws.
The No Child Left Behind Room where your children are detained.
PLEASE GIVE GENEROUSLY!
Sincerely,
Jack Abramoff, Co-Chair
G.W. Bush Library Board of Directors
PS: The library will feature an electron microscope to help you locate and view the President's accomplishments.